@gshellen

I used to say things here, but now I don’t

 Oakland(ish), CA
grantshellen.com
Joined July 2006
  • Tweets5.8K
  • Following731
  • Followers1.5K
204Media
Grant Shellen retweeted
Paul Ford@ftrain20 Oct 2020
I will no longer “buckle up” or “strap in” simply to read threads, it's embarrassing to me.
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*order pjs on Amazon *go to bed *wake to someone putting pjs on me Me: WHAT IN THE HOLY- Amazon employee: SHHHHHH, this is part of Prime now xitter.cf/NBCNews/status/9233610…
NBC News
@NBCNews26 Oct 2017
Amazon will now deliver inside your home and record the whole thing nbcnews.trib.al/qEmgYjz
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Sam Sykes@SamSykesSwears30 Apr 2017
Remember: having a writing career is as simple as A B C Always Be Crying at the possibility of accomplishing nothing & dying alone
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Grant Shellen retweeted
mat honan ☀️@mat12 Dec 2016
rad: womenwhodraw.com/
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Brian Heater@bheater6 Apr 2016
Trump would have fallen in Wonka's chocolate river in the first five minutes.
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Grant Shellen retweeted
adoptnik@adoptnik22 Mar 2016
'gin' has been adopted by Grant Shellen @gshellen at @Wordnik: wordnik.com/words/gin
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Brian Heater@bheater5 Oct 2015
What's the worst alternative universe Traveling Wilburys? I vote Paul Simon, Sting, Billy Joel and Dave Matthews.
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Kate Kiefer Lee@katekiefer1 Oct 2015
Read only the subject lines and pretend I’m in a secret relationship with President Obama
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Replying to @mulegirl
@mulegirl @norcross It's time for our our devices to gain other personality traits. Try our new "polite" thermostat or our "sassy" watch.
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Grant Shellen retweeted
nevona@nevona24 Mar 2015
hi i'm ted cruz, definitely not three toddlers stacked no sir
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Told my pet chimp to clean the bathroom while I'm out buying frozen burritos. Hope he knows not to use the bleach and ammonia together!
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One of the first band stickers we ever made.
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Harris Wittels@twittels20 May 2014
Also lets stop finding a new witch of the week and burning them at the stake. We are all horrible and wonderful and figuring it out.
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Neven Mrgan@mrgan20 Jan 2015
I'm fine eating whole fish, but this plating from Thomas Keller's 'Bouchon' is like a serial killer's handiwork
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Toddler Tip: An easy way to show someone you care is to stalk them throughout their home.
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Miles Traer@Geo_Miles11 Dec 2014
Storm preparation around the Americas (cc @burritojustice @Theremina @stevesilberman @cbdawson)
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Beane's next "significant move": locking the door behind us at 2015 Fan Fest and informing us we've all been traded to Milwaukee.
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Have you ever seen those cartoons where Wile E. Coyote doesn't realize he ran off the cliff xitter.cf/redskins/status/537946…
Washington Commanders
@Commanders27 Nov 2014
From our family to yours, have a very safe and Happy #Thanksgiving. #HappyThanksgiving #HTTR
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Grant Shellen retweeted
Neven Mrgan@mrgan20 Sep 2014
Is that an iPhone 6+ in your pocket or are you happy to live in an age of unprecedented technological progress more accessible than ever?
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A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it’s not that good.
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