ALT a hovawart, which looks just like a golden retriever, sprawls across a gray tile floor, all four limbs splooting out in opposite directions like a bearskin rug. the dog is wearing a dark pair of gym shorts with white striping along the sides. his tail poofs out from the bottom in a tuft of fur. his expression is… shall we say nonplussed.
ALT 1 markers and sings, lip syncs, dances, or otherwise performs for entertainment to appeal to a prurient interest 2 THAT FEATURES DRAG QUEENS, TOPLESS DANCERS, EXOTIC DANCERS, STRIPPERS, OR MALE OR FEMALE 3 IMPERSONATORS OR SIMILAR ENTERTAINERS WHO PROVIDE ENTERTAINMENT THAT APPEALS TO A PRURIENT INTEREST IN 4 SEX, REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT PERFORMED FOR CONSIDERATION. 5 (2) "DRAG QUEEN" MEANS A MALE OR FEMALE PERFORMER WHO ADOPTS A FLAMBOYANT OR PARODIC 6 FEMININE PERSONA WITH GLAMOROUS OR EXAGGERATED COSTUMES AND MAKEUP. 7 (3) "DRAG STORY HOUR" MEANS AN EVENT HOSTED BY A DRAG QUEEN WHO READS CHILDREN'S BOOKS. 8 (4) "EXOTIC DANCER" MEANS AN INDIVIDUAL WHO DANCES OR PERFORMS IN A SEDUCTIVE OR 9 PROVOCATIVE MANNER WHILE SCANTILY DRESSED OR WHILE GRADUALLY REMOVING THEIR CLOTHES PIECE BY PIECE. 10 (5) "MINOR" MEANS AN INDIVIDUAL UNDER 18 YEARS OF AGE
ALT 8 pics of squirrels. #1 angry squirrel yelling at the viewer, #2 hungry squirrel pigging out with mouth stuffed with peanuts, #3 2 squirrels flipping out with one leaping and other behind it with silly panicked face, #4 nosy squirrel peering around the corner at you, #5 cold squirrel in the snow and not happy about it, #6 grumpy and possibly judgmental squirrel with arms crossed, #7 horny squirrel threesome, #8 too hot squirrel splooting with its tail straight up on outdoor unit of air conditioner
