@darksidedeb

I teethed on Milkbones™

 Canada's Ocean Playground
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Joined September 2014
  • Tweets27K
  • Following1.8K
  • Followers16.3K
13.8KMedia
They call me 'ATM' because every day I withdraw a little more.
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youtu.be/_OzbmriDgQc?si=BLV1…
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I can't explain it but 5 x 5 = 25 gives off the same vibe as Friday.
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Adam@adamgreattweet18 Sep 2024
commercials should be the same volume as the show, we have the technology
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Tupperware is filing for bankruptcy. They would have kept a lid on the news but they couldn't find one.
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jame
@kloogans3 Oct 2022
too many generic kid names like "chris" and "jake" out there. if i had a son i'd name him something bad ass. like "the shovel"
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jon drake@DrakeGatsby17 Sep 2024
“I’m playing chess while you’re playing checkers” wrong. I’m playing a third game I just made up and it’s called jumpy circles
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Ron Iver@ronnui_17 Sep 2024
This protein packed pasta only uses 6 simple ingredients and just takes 30 minutes and requires you to wash a psychologically damaging amount of dishes!
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Did you ever think about how there's wild horses out there, just running around on bare feet?
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All of the hashtags in your bio gave me an anxiety attack. Pass.
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Me [watching war movie]: I like this character. I hope he lives. Character: *makes emotional speech about what he’ll do when he gets home from the war* Me: Dammit.
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The B.
@anerdonfire220 Sep 2024
I choose peace motherfucker.
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Welcome to your 40s: you’re not having a midlife crisis you’re just awake.
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i found a Skittle in my bra and i'm hoping that's a portent of a good day
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When you’re a teacher, how you dress on “professional days” is who you really are
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What we're doing is we're watching Con Air.
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whoops accidentally said I couldn't make it before they even said the date
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When you already like them... then they throw you a Back to the Future reference... they're a keeper
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Going back to your first Instagram post and liking one everyday like I’m Michael Myers slowly chasing you
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lolt64🕵️@lolt6419 Sep 2024
when you carbonation burp and it seems to come from somewhere deeper, older
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