@aussiecomedy

since way back before then

 australia
Joined June 2009
  • Tweets2.2K
  • Following541
  • Followers1.1K
53Media
10,000 people at the Melbourne Cup will be the biggest crowd to witness horse cruelty since the anti-lockdown protests in Sydney.
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Glen@Glen5019206126 Sep 2021
New government rule: Only vaccinated people can protest against the Vaccination.
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Can someone please explain to me how an earthquake from Mansfield was allowed to travel into Melbourne without a permit?
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If the 5km radius stays over summer we will see all the inner west hunnies sunbathing in the mud and swimming next to a dead ibis in the Cooks River
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Bec Shaw@Brocklesnitch14 Dec 2020
What's the secret behind NSW's Covid Contact Tracing? Find out by watching this sketch i wrote with @ninaoyama for the @chaser's war on 2020. Directed by @jennaown & @vzerbst who also star in it and made it v good imo.

Contact Tracies - War On 2020

In order to track down the latest COVID outbreak, the health department have called in the best tracers in the business - teenage girls

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A bit of Aussie lockdown humour
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Marcus Ryan@itsmarcusryan1 Sep 2021
Playgrounds set to open up again in Victoria's lockdown. Even paedophiles get to go back to work before I do! 😭
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NSW road map out of lockdown #lockdown #covid #roadmap #auspol @GladysB
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At what point do we call indefinite booster shots 'addiction'? #covid19
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So if this virus is taking over the world shouldn’t we start working with it rather than against it #Covid 🦠 🌎
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@StageOne@Lee_Heather @BrunoLucia @StageOneIFF fun times at Sea World for Stage One Film Fest #SOIFF 🐬🎥🎬
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Mr Denmore@MrDenmore13 May 2014
This $20 billion Medical 'Future Fund', where does the money come from? GP surgeries' jars stashed with the loose change of single mothers?
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Despite @TonyAbbottMHR promising no cuts to Twitter, Australians will now have only 120 characters to complain about #Budget2014 #auspol
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Creepy Guy@CreepyGuy13 Feb 2014
The last three people I've had a fight with have all been shop assistants enforcing a $10 minimum on EFTPOS. I hate buying my wife jewellery
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Leah@allofaustralia3 Mar 2013
RT @sean_woodland: @RichieBenaud_ It's Clean up Australia Day today. I thought India did that yesterday. #INDvAUS
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We are an hour behind you @allofmelbourne so if its the end of the world @ midnight your time can you tweet & let us know pls#endoftheworld
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Exploited by Social Conditioning and feeding the greedy Capitalist Machine . . or Putting up the Christmas tree with the kids and loving it
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Daniel Townes@danieltownes7 Nov 2012
Heads up, all of my tweets now come with a signature. Sent from my iPhone.
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Creepy Guy@CreepyGuy26 Oct 2012
I can usually tell within the first two minutes of meeting someone whether or not I am wearing pants.
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Conor Pope@Conorpope8 Oct 2012
"Tell me about Twitter, Dad." "Well son, we would piece together the news of the day by reading strangers' decontextified jokes about it."
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