@split_splitting

worn and molded-over

 she/her
Joined October 2009
  • Tweets24K
  • Following729
  • Followers981
5.2KMedia
We had a 3 am poop party last night and then he passed out before I could even swaddle him. Thinking about the person who said a 12 year old could do my job. I fucking wish a 12 year old would have cleaned up the amount of shit I cleaned up last night. I will pay one to do it
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Omg this is so beautiful and thoughtful??
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Ohhhh sleepy
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Love this
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drama 💀
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Josh I already told you I liked your fic idea, leave me alone
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Taking this gatekeepy tweet to show off the single Ls dunes tweet I could find from 2023 on my account because it’s pretty good
samantha 🐛@split_splitting10 Jul 2023
The last thing you see before ls dunes kicks your ass
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Tell me 5 things that make you think of me I’m bored at work beangreen.straw.page
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One of the girls who helps with my program is being added to the list
samantha 🐛@split_splittingOct 17
Things that are homophobic against me specifically: Ambient lighting Dogs Josh and Aron Rent My car The baby I take care of who won’t fall asleep unless I hum itsy bitsy spider 100 times while doing squats Being served dairy Buc-ee’s
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Things that are homophobic against me specifically: Ambient lighting Dogs Josh and Aron Rent My car The baby I take care of who won’t fall asleep unless I hum itsy bitsy spider 100 times while doing squats Being served dairy Buc-ee’s
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Squooshey mouse
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*** cannot go a week without fighting with someone on mcrtwt about thee most meaningless situations. it’s kind of sad honestly. and all their friends jump in instead of being like hey. Let it go. Get better friends!!!
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2020 • 2026 Honestly me in 2020 would never ever expect current me to be working full time with infants. I had such a different career path. Sometimes I still grieve what could have been.
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Someone bought a whole bunch of expensive shit off my program’s wishlist 🥹
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The amount of times Dan Lippert brings up MCR in improv really makes me fall in love with him a little bit. Another man added to the list that makes me a fakebian
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Got a cool new thing for my sensory play class
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I should go to the dunes shows just because I can. I’ll tell Anthony our one-sided beef ruined my internet reputation. I’ll bring a my chemical romance cd for the whole band to sign. What else. I’ll dress up like Tim
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No because they already made a call out thread about me with all my crimes and every time I do something bad it gets added to the list (this tweet is about me, replying to a hate tweet about me)
spooky mars@bloodsuckervmpOct 14
Do you guys ever get paranoid that there's something really bad about you out there that people are aware of but you aren't and nobody's telling you about it
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If you believed the Frank bj photo was real I need you to please unlock the part of your brain that controls critical thinking and get it together. Check into reality please
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I’m partnering with WIC to host free classes next year 🥹 I’m so proud of what I’m able to do in my community
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When I first started this program I was excited that my education and experience allowed me the ability to create accessible quality classes for families and my dedicated team of haters tried to diminish my work but in less than a year I’m doing exactly what I set out to do
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