Lisa retweeted
Dog: I need to go outside.
Me: You just came inside.
Dog: New information has come to light.
Lisa retweeted
me calling someone back and hoping they don't answer so i can use it as evidence that I tried
Lisa retweeted
Pretty good actually.
Lisa retweeted
No sé qué le habrá hecho a su novia pero espero le perdone 🌸❤ xitter.cf/_soyrubitaaa_/status/2…
Replying to @Sammy__Edmund
Again, by your logic Sam, if ratings = great concept, why stop at 10?
Make it 14. Fuck it, let everyone into Finals! Imagine the ratings if Essendon won the Premiership in the same year as a Wooden Spoon? Ratings Bonanza!
High ratings only prove people will watch something. They don’t prove it’s a good idea. It's just a cash grab.
Lisa retweeted
“I don’t know how you’re doing on the inside, honey, but your hair is just holdin’ up beautiful.”
Lisa retweeted
Since my friend came over with her dog I haven't seen my cat anywhere, then I noticed this.
I stayed at someone's house last week and they have a cat. And I never knew this but, when you go to sleep... cats just wander about the house catting all night? You can't "put a cat to bed"?! The cat just... gets the house for a while?! Fucking nuts.
Lisa retweeted
Instead of calling in sick, we should be able to call in healthy.
“I’m not coming in today. I feel really good and I don’t want to waste it at work.”
Lisa retweeted
am i the only person left on earth that thinks it’s extremely weird to take creep shots of strangers for doing totally normal things


























