Andrew Manning

They shouldn’t allow those lighters that look like pistols. People can mistake them and get hurt. For example, I just burned the roof of my mouth pretty badly.

Yes this is art. Recorded 4 months ago.

I feel like every time I open this app i see this chode has found a new, clearer and deeper way to expose himself as a perfect dork. He has uncanny precision with choosing the cringiest arrangement of words possible, and to top it off he promotes his own posts to the top.

Sending this to people via text instead of doing it irl en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_…

Little late to the game here but I think that movie should have been called “An Orange Clockwork”

George Foreman died. I think I know how he’s being cremated.

francis ford coppola dedicating megalopolis to his wife is the meanest thing anybody has ever done to their spouse

One of my biggest losses occurred today after I confidently started a claim with customer service and slowly realized I am fundamentally wrong about the issue, and am as stupid as the CS rep must have been saying I am to their work friends.

Pouring one out for the big guy

Swing low, sweet chariot

Some of you clearly didn’t see his family ask that you please respect their wishes for privacy and grace.

The juice is home now

Some people think it’s weird my dog takes human meds. Me, I’m just glad he can get hard again.

How about an NPR show called Wait Wait Don’t Smell Me and it’s about a couple about to have sex but one is self conscious, so they just do hand stuff.

Uncontroversial take: people who take their dogs off leash in the open should be put down

Hello timeline, and others who I may connect with. Observe this dumb shit please, and interact with this post!

In an effort to reduce my caffeine intake, I have switched from 5-6 coffees a day to however many green teas gives me the exact same feeling.