@TheTimDurham

Delightful. @AskOffTrack. I wrote a kids book that's not for kids.

 Los Angeles
a.co/d/2AWYv0W
Joined June 2009
  • Tweets13.9K
  • Following788
  • Followers4.9K
1.8KMedia
"Hello! Do you have a minute to talk about Dracula?" "No- wait, Dracula?" "Yes!" "You're vampires?" "Yes. We have pamphlets." "Vampires have missionaries?" "Where else would new vampires come from?" "I assumed you bit people." "There are many hurtful stereotypes. May we come in?"
481
31,712
1,576
107,599
Good pitch.
Cody Clarke / Kill The Lion Films
@codyclarkeOct 15
they should do an air bud-style hockey movie where jason from friday the 13th becomes a goalie on a college team and he's really good—downside is that when he's not playing he's killing a lot of the kids at the school
1
2
260
french is a fundamentally unserious language
57
615
43
9,327
185,128
Tim Durham retweeted
TrivWorks@TrivWorksSep 23
Boarding a plane shortly. The pilot’s never flown before, but he’s an outsider who tells it like it is, and it’s time for a change
2
3
1
5
596
I lost my thesaurus and I'm gutted. Totally gutted, absolutely gutted.
94
3,133
53
80,871
1,169,716
Tim Durham retweeted
Scott McKain
@scottmckainSep 13
I really think the podcast drove this — @TheTimDurham
Alexander Rossi
@AlexanderRossiSep 12
Up 57% from 2024 is unreal. Thank you @FOXSports @IndyCarOnFOX
1
1
16
1,096
The premise is they are the Muppets and they have a show
DiscussingFilm
@DiscussingFilmSep 10
There are currently no active conversations for a full ‘MUPPET SHOW’ series revival. Disney, The Muppets Studio and Point Grey Pictures have had difficulties with deciding on a premise for the series that they can all agree on. (Source: Deadline)
42
1,560
4
15,955
324,970
Tim Durham retweeted
Nick Yeoman@NYeomanSep 7
With all due to respect to the 3 winners… It’s Loek Hartog
SPEED on FOX
@SPEEDonFOXSep 7
Who should be Driver of the Week?
25
332
5
6,040
158,857
Unsure what you’re talking about 🇺🇸
48 T-WAVE
@artists_MRX2024Sep 6
Replying to @smclaughlin93
track limits are the white lines that define the race track surface layout?
18
19
2
700
28,508
Tim Durham retweeted
Sarah Burssty@SarahBursstySep 5
the radio star:
Fuck Every Word 2.0@fckeveryword7 Jul 2020
fuck video
38
4,487
21
42,428
646,601
F1 Drive to Survive Stan’s out for my boy Colt this morning. Dudes unbelievably gifted. Can’t wait to see him achieve his dreams while yall wait for your next season on Netflix
78
161
128
2,131
180,463
Tim Durham retweeted
Craig
@CS11__Sep 3
Just threw an enormous amount of bullshit onto the board and went for it. I’m in.
DiscussingFilm
@DiscussingFilmSep 3
Inde Navarrette will star in a new sci-fi thriller ‘THE WAFFLE HOUSE INDEX’ for Apple. The film follows a Waffle House waitress who has a terrible night shift featuring a gunman, a mass flood, killer crocodiles, a nuclear explosion, a magical bunker under the Waffle House & aliens. (Source: hollywoodreporter.com/movies…)
8
94
3,354
124,065
Tim Curry is survived by Snuffy, Al, Leo, Little Mo with the gimpy leg, Cheeks, Bony Bob, and Cliff.
165
2,309
174
14,026
651,403
Fans at the IndyCar Grand Prix in the Sports Capital. 🏎‍🏁 Visitors—we encourage you to support local and experience all that our city has to offer.
24
27
5
341
34,861
Oh this bartender HATES getting tickled
6
228
5
4,723
119,548
Tim Durham retweeted
Soleil@soleiljolinaAug 19
The fact that 8pm is only 3 hours after 5pm is fucking insane. We have to do something about this
260
22,445
317
299,038
4,017,342
Tim Durham retweeted
Degen CPA
@drewventoAug 19
It was a tallboy that had 12% alcohol and 156mg of caffeine per can. We would drink two of them, vomit different colors of the rainbow, and then black out, as was the style at the time.
394
2,968
287
48,210
2,249,263
I never considered we could call them by their full government names, my bad
Dead Kanerva@ekanervaAug 17
Indianapolis cars put on a great show. I think this is the first time I've ever been to Markham. This was my favourite view of the track. 🚆🏁
22
292
6
10,465
331,662
A MAN *bang bang* NAMED SCOTTY *bang bang* DOESN'T KNOW *bang bang* THAT FIONA AND ME *bang bang* DO IT IN MY VAN EVERY SUNDAY *bang bang*
6
42
1
513
19,893
Done and dusted. 🏁 Proud of this project. 17 months in the making. Pre-orders Dec 1. More info to come.
25
29
2
322
9,685
Load more