Los Angeles, CA. Stand Up Comic. Writer for @realpunknews @HardDriveMag & The Inner Loop. @samlibutti : ig
Los Angeles, CA
Joined October 2017
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INJURY UPDATE: 49ers Jed York Out For 6 Weeks (Prostitution)
49ers owner Jed York has been suspended for six games and fined $500,000 for violating the NFL's personal conduct policy stemming from his August arrest on suspicion of engaging in prostitution in Ohio. spr.ly/6015BGva39
Jed York Busted In Prostitution Sting, And Also Was Arrested
🇺🇸 San Francisco 49ers owner Jed York was arrested in a prostitution sting in East Palestine, Ohio.
Police say he answered an undercover online ad, used the name Joe, and agreed to pay $160 for an hour.
Officers stopped him at a mobile home park on August 23 and found cash in the rental SUV.
The prostitution charge was later dropped to disorderly conduct. He entered a no-contest plea, got one day in jail already served, and a $1,150 fine.
The NFL is reviewing it under the personal conduct policy. York has not spoken publicly.
Writer: Sol
Heard some guy say “that sounds gay to be frank” and my brain immediately lit up and told me to tweet that singing Gay To Be Frank to the tune of Hip To Be Square would be funny. End of update, ty for listening.
Do you think Anthony Fantano was mad about Halsey going through chemo because it gave her a more valid reason for being bald?
I’ll take a big shit and then judge dudes who look like they weigh what I weighed before I took the shit #fatonfatcrime
Going to hardcore shows and tapping everyone in the pit on the shoulder and asking them if they can move the pit over one foot so I can see better
Me: God people are so Tribalistic, what a silly instinct
Also me: I hope a plane carrying the Dallas Cowboys crashes directly into a field containing the entire Philadelphia Eagles organization
November should be reserved for one last chance to enjoy stuff like pumpkin patches without the threat of a theatre kid in a mask yelling at you
Haunted houses should be converted to cozy fall houses where each room features progressively larger and more alarming cornucopias
There’s this weird period in like the 80s and 90s where in a movie if a person is holding a cell phone, it means they are a complete piece of shit who hates their kids.
Just saw #HIM & if they want to realistically show how someone like Patrick Mahomes gets his power the twist at the end should be that it’s a cult of biased referees
I’m trying to figure out how I can make a meme of the rizzler posted up with the sniper just waddling away at an immense pace outrunning the fbi
I’d like to welcome you all to the 10th annual meeting of the Pedophile Defeaters Squad, as you know we have just elected our new leader
Pedophile “has sex with children” Rapeington
Tim Robinson is the angel on your shoulder telling you the jack off, Connor O’Malley is the devil on your other shoulder telling you to jack on in an entirely different more devious way
Why tf does that picture of the #Coldplay cheaters look like a vision appearing to the wicked witch in her orb (professional artist rendering below for comparison)
He looks like a Tim Robinson character who is dying but can't afford to go to the doctor because he keeps spending his money on newer more elaborate fedoras
