
🔬 Profiling @DatadogHQ 🐘 PHP Core Contributor 🧵 ext-parallel Maintainer ⚡️ Performance, Concurrency & Observability 👨👧👦 6x Dad
Germany
Joined August 2017
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Florian Engelhardt retweeted

Nils Adermann@naderman1h
Germany
GermanyConnected via Czech Republic Android AppAccount-level information, not a live location or per-post device.
If all the govs shutting down servers for a PHP update, all the hosters & enterprises terrified by the vuln, gave $100k, or just $50k a year to the PHP Foundation, things could look very differently. Go, make your employer sponsor *today* thephp.foundation/sponsor/ #php #phpc @ThePHPF
Florian Engelhardt retweeted

Nils Adermann@nadermanOct 21
Germany
GermanyConnected via Czech Republic Android AppAccount-level information, not a live location or per-post device.
Read the story around the security vulnerabilities fixed in PHP today that I wrote up for the PHP Foundation, what an exhausting last week in this process. Glad it's out, hoping you all update ASAP.
The PHP Foundation@ThePHPFOct 21United States
United StatesConnected via Netherlands App StoreAccount-level information, not a live location or per-post device.
We have posted more information about today's security releases, including the sequence of events that led to the discovery, how the PHP security team is improving their processes, and what we need from you to continue this critical work. #php #security thephp.foundation/blog/2026/…
Florian Engelhardt retweeted
This year we're excited to live stream our keynote sessions, free to everyone! Join us at buff.ly/AkQw7se tomorrow (Friday, Oct 16th) at 9am and 5pm (CDT)
Virtual tickets for Friday are still available, including recordings after the conference! buff.ly/pT8zS2c
Replying to @PierreJoye @davepl1968
I'd say we should not settle with less then an approval from the elders of the internet 😜
Florian Engelhardt retweeted
Datadog has been a great supporter of Longhorn PHP for a while now. Also if you haven't tried out their Bits agent... it's fantastic
Thanks to @datadoghq for being a sponsor of LonghornPHP this year! Datadog allows developers to see across systems, apps, and services, and seamlessly aggregates metrics and events across the full devops stack.
buff.ly/4nPxvEV
Austin! 🤠🐘 I’ll be at @LonghornPHP Oct 15–16!
I'll be talking about multithreading in PHP and hanging out at the @datadoghq booth.
Happy to talk profiling, tracing, logging, performance & all the weird stuff happening in your production PHP stack!
I'll have ElePHPants!
Thanks to @datadoghq for being a sponsor of LonghornPHP this year! Datadog allows developers to see across systems, apps, and services, and seamlessly aggregates metrics and events across the full devops stack.
buff.ly/4nPxvEV
Replying to @faguo
Usually sour. Sweet is also fine from time to time. But not salty ...
I am a very tolerant person, I believe people should be free to live their lives however they want, but you have to draw a line somewhere!
Salt pickles 🥒
Accidentally bought a jar the other day and only realized when I took a bite. Absolutely fucking vile.
I am thrilled to be part of the amazing line up of speakers at @LonghornPHP
Get your tickets at longhornphp.com/ and see you in Austin 🇺🇸
Ever faced a heavy task & thought maybe PHP isn't the right tool? Join @realFlowControl's "Parallel Futures: Unlocking Multithreading in PHP" to tackle demanding tasks, scale applications, & unlock performance you didn’t think possible. Tickets: buff.ly/Z42n9Lr
Florian Engelhardt retweeted
AI slop has fundamentally changed how I experience reading.
I now notice the tells everywhere. The short, punchy sentences. The relentless groups of three. The em dashes—the unnecessary little asides.
And once you see it, you can’t unsee it.
The worst part? My brain now flags perfectly innocent human writing as AI slop too. AI hasn’t just made me enjoy bad writing less. It’s made me suspicious of all writing.
That’s a real loss.
Florian Engelhardt retweeted
Howdy folks! In case you missed it, our schedule is live! Check out all the speakers & talks - and if you hurry, you can still get blind bird pricing! We have a great lineup this year: 20 amazing speakers, 3 workshop tracks Thurs & 3 talk tracks Fri.
longhornphp.com/schedule
Florian Engelhardt retweeted
3,5 Millionen Kunden hat Lottoland in Deutschland. Viele denken, sie würden dort tatsächlich Lotto spielen. Allerdings nehmen sie an illegalem Glücksspiel teil.
Uns als Gesellschaft entgingen dadurch 2019-2023 mutmaßlich über 400 Millionen Euro Steuern.
lilithwittmann.medium.com/wi…
Replying to @frankdejonge
This question hasn’t been asked nearly enough, and it’s even more relevant now that LLMs let us write code so much faster.
Replying to @GregKamradt
Did you re-run this experiment with newer models?
Replying to @realFlowControl @alexdaubois
The cutoff size for mmap is 2 MB - 4 KB: the first page of each chunk holds the chunk header (heap ptr, page map, free map, …), thats why I used "~2MB" in the previous tweet,









