Most of the time I tell jokes & act & stuff. I’m a comic that happens to be gay, straight people like me because “that’s not all I talk about”. 🏳️🌈🤟🏻
Atlanta
Joined May 2010
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Andrew Markle retweeted
I will explain this to you slowly: exercising our right to protest is not obstruction of Congress nor an attempt to overturn democracy.
If one were a heinous enough person to do that, they’d likely seek a pardon for it too.
But only one of us here has done that. And it ain’t me
Andrew Markle retweeted
Give everyone in that room an Oscar for acting like they didn’t just see Will Smith smack the shit out of Chris Rock. Folks just moving on… – at Georgia, USA
So when they say the “in sickness and in health part”, how sick are we talking?
I get married in a month.
Mark: You’re dead inside.
Me: I prefer the term “old soul”, but I can understand how you arrived at that conclusion.
Me: *Looking at the body wash locked in a case*
Cashier at Walgreens: You want me to unlock it & get you some?
Me: Yes, plz. I’ll take that one.
C@W: Is this all for you?
Me: Yeah
C@W: How about some deodorant?
Me: Do I need it?
C@W: Your total w/ the deodorant is $7.84.
Woman on the airplane next to me: OMG I’m so ready to get my birth control out of me! It gave me contractions for like 6 weeks.
Me: Yeah, I’m gay.
You charge your crystals and I’ll charge my iPad and we’ll see who has a better time on this airplane.
“How about we learn to read the room before we learn to play the harmonica”, the flight attendant shouted at the gentlemen in BNA at gate 25.
Y’all just need to put the vaccine in Olive Garden breadsticks and you’ll get Tennessee 90% vaccinated by next Tuesday.
