Robot John Ortved. New York Times contributor. Words in Vogue, Vanity Fair, New Yorker, McSweeney's, etc. Views are my own(er's). john.ortved(at)gmail(dot)com
new york
Joined April 2008
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Walter Benjameme retweeted
🚨 BREAKTHROUGH: 25-year-old Argentinian biologist Pilar Ferrer has developed an injectable gel that helps repair damaged heart tissue after a heart attack
Desperately need to see their Homeowners Association bi-laws
Mountain lions stall plan to build 400 residences on Woodland Hills golf course latimes.com/california/story…
Not to piss on anyone’s cornflakes, but this just makes me think that Graham Nash was terrible at Risk (which, if you get high enough, is no longer called “Risk” but “Color Map Shaky Pieces”).
Graham Nash once recalled that Jimi Hendrix loved playing the board game “Risk” while under the influence of LSD and that it was practically impossible to beat him. Nash, who played with Hendrix and later became a member of Crosby, Stills & Nash, shared this anecdote during a 2018 interview on SiriusXM.
According to Nash, Hendrix’s mastery of “Risk” may have stemmed from his military background. Before becoming a music icon, Hendrix served as a paratrooper in the 101st Airborne Division and was honorably discharged in 1962.
Walter Benjameme retweeted
Canadian pipe band crowned world champions after 'thrilling' contest bbc.in/4bSzeEE
Walter Benjameme retweeted
New Yorkers, check out these amazing beers by @MoodyTongue at the @pstamaki. Yuzu, daidai, and sudachi. For @EdibleManhattan by @jortved:
ediblemanhattan.com/restaura…
My richest trust fund baby friend told me he has trouble getting hard without pills. Me: “Soft luxury.”
He laughed.
Walter Benjameme retweeted
"Enjoy the bagels." Inside a tumultuous showdown between Scott Pelley and Nick Bilton, the new executive producer of "60 Minutes." w/@grynbaum
nytimes.com/2026/06/01/busin…
Let’s see AI do this!
Cocaine-fueled sharks are on the prowl in the Caribbean - scientists blame partying tourists trib.al/kFRWSAr
Walter Benjameme retweeted
Cocaine-fueled sharks are on the prowl in the Caribbean - scientists blame partying tourists trib.al/kFRWSAr
Walter Benjameme retweeted
SATURDAY MARCH 14TH, 3:00 PM!
New Orleans!
Tulane Campus!
SUSAN MORRISON!
Author of the definitive biography of the creator of Saturday Night Live, Lorne Michaels!
Join us!
Free!
@tulanehull
@NOLAnews
@WWOZ
@ComedyGumbeaux
@The_Gambit
@whereyatnola
@NOLAbookfest
Do not buy anything from @snipes_usa EVER!
Worst customer service. Just bots on bots on bots.
Do not WASTE YOUR TIME OR MONEY.
Walter Benjameme retweeted
it’s Bills Week at Defector so I decided to read the new 1000 page Buckley biography defector.com/william-f-buckl…
Walter Benjameme retweeted
Specialty foods rule our Summer issue. From foraged flowers upstate to coffee and freshly baked baguettes in Chinatown, taste becomes a bridge between kitchens, cultures and people.
ON THE COVER
Yasmin Kaytmaz (@yazzzkat) Bets On @derbycupcoffee
Story written by @jortved
Walter Benjameme retweeted
In February 1963, the photographer Don Hunstein took the picture of Bob Dylan and Suze Rotolo walking arm-in-arm down Jones Street that would become the cover of 'The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan'. Forty years later, writer @jortved moved into a rent-stabilized apartment on the block and has been watching people recreate this moment — sometimes enthusiastically, sometimes sheepishly — ever since.
Walter Benjameme retweeted
The team behind the legendary @fourhorsemenbk rides again with @icavallinibk, opening in Williamsburg this spring. Our editor, @jortved, got the scoop!
Read the article at the link in bio.
