itschughes retweeted
When my girlfriend and her friends go to the bathroom and I get stuck talking to the other boyfriend
This was my first A&M/UT game as a student. So funny to think how happy we were to beat UT and be 7-5. Simpler times, man.
itschughes retweeted
Villains in Pokemon are like, “I’m going to take over the planet, and you can’t stop me!” And then their team is like fucking four zubats.
Bro you gotta come to the crib. No seriously, it has so many bastions it’s impossible to siege.
*paying for my Jersey Mikes sub with Shorepoints*
Yeah man it’s a walled garden. People want to get in because they see us having so much fun.
itschughes retweeted
The hardest Beavis and Butthead ever made me laugh was one where they're watching a music video set in front of the Egyptian pyramids and one of them says, "where the hell is this"
itschughes retweeted
Deleted Paultom City storyline
The Arcane Texas Fact of the Day is one of the most Texas things I've ever read: Last Thursday, a high school football game here in Texas was played under a Rattlesnake Advisory. It's true. Prior to Thursday night's game between Kaufer and Corpus Christi John Paul II, the Riviera Independendent School District posted the following announcement on social media:
"⚠️ FOOTBALL GAME SAFETY ANNOUNCEMENT
Due to the increased presence of rattlesnakes in the area, we ask all parents and spectators to please use extra caution while attending tonight’s football game.
For everyone’s safety, please do not allow children to play in the long jump area of the football field or underneath the stadium seating.
Please stay alert, supervise children closely, and avoid areas that are not designated for spectators.
Thank you for helping us keep everyone safe! ⚠️"
That's right: not a tornado warning or a heat advisory, but a rattlesnake advisory. Folks in other states might think that's crazy, but, hey, this is Texas and this is high school football that we're talking about. I can hear the conversation now: "Grab the lawn chairs and the snake boots, honey, kickoff is in thirty minutes.”😃
Thanks to Cindy Wood for letting me know about this.
itschughes retweeted
you think you’ve seen all the variants of autism, and then you discover just one more
Watching this and then staring off into the distance, shaking my head and smiling, gently whispering to myself
“🎶they said my dick is small🎶 and my balls are too small too🎶”
itschughes retweeted
Country music legend Dolly Parton has died
news.sky.com/story/country-m…

























