
@conanobrienswyf is my bio
St. Pete Florida
Joined August 2010
- Tweets13.6K
- Following606
- Followers2.3K
- Likes106K
Pinned Tweet
write your goals on little pieces of paper and put them in a jar then at the end of the year use them as kindling to burn your house down
Sorry if you see me celebrating on the anniversary of Charlie Kirk's death but that's also the day I quit vaping
I just don't know how my wife deals with all this rugged sexiness.
#rugged #sexiness #imeancomeon #toxicmasculinity #mywife #fordf150 #fordtough #notpaleo
instagram.com/p/CcrW_JCuIk5/…
Somebody needs to invent Whooperware™️. I'm constantly opening up a can and only whooping a little ass then the rest goes bad on the kitchen counter.
Growing up, my mom always told me to keep my nose clean which was very helpful because the cocaine goes up there way easier that way.
descendant of cain retweeted
People who are offended when I breastfeed in public need to STFU. What I'm doing is natural and strengthens the bond between me and my dog.
descendant of cain retweeted
the church: astrology is not real
the three wisemen: we were led here by a star
Go to a fancy restaurant and when they hand you the menu yell "HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT THIS WITHOUT KETCHUP?"
descendant of cain retweeted
Merry Christmas from @conanobrienswyf and I!
descendant of cain retweeted
I accidentally opened a photo of Timothy Chalamet, thinking it was a drawing of a small haunted doll, and now my IG algorithm is absolutely fucked



