Sick societal irony If you go sober n turn down parties, drinking events n general boozing socializing. You get “you need to live, don’t be a hermit, don’t you care about us?” Aka your bad and being OCD If you ask the same people to go run with you, attend a seminar, help you build a car etc You get “I’m busy, hungover, no time, I’m not into that” Aka you’re silly for asking. The simple truth is that you don’t lose your social life if you’re sober. You just stop liking boring things such as standing in a room for 4 hours with people getting high. But in our society this is so normal that your made to feel weird for not enjoying it. Your not. You’re not lacking at all socially. It’s just boring. But then you get lonely because you’re also made to feel weird for expecting these same people to do things they might not enjoy back with you. Double whammy. If people really wanted to spend time with you and care about you they’d want to do things that make you happy with you. But they usually won’t because….bum bum bum…they find it boring. Yet they are off the hook and “normal” for this. After all, they remember to “live” by routinely getting high on booze n binge eating. They are okay. My point : the main reason non addicts have trouble dropping drinking is social reasons. The truth is you probably just don’t enjoy the people or the events you regular unless your high. In the same way these people don’t enjoy healthy things you want to move to. Don’t feel shame or like you should enjoy things you don’t. People that care about you shouldn’t want you to do things you don’t enjoy either. If they care they will find a middle ground. Or maybe….you are not actually friends and just each others drinking accessories. Put all the same people “living” in a room with each other…minus drugs…and they will clawing their eyes out trying to find an excuse to leave in 10 minutes. I’m not the definer of good or bad BUT that doesn’t sound like living. It sounds like coping from lack of living together. Regardless, you’re “living” just fine. You don’t have to feel bad for not accepting to do “socializing” on terms you don’t enjoy. If hanging with your “good friend” makes you unhappy….stop doing it. Move on, you used to enjoy it, now you don’t. This isn’t marriage or prison, onto something you enjoy. Find people that want to go on a run with you or play chess or build something. Join a MMA club or communities. Theres lots of them and you can have a social life without hurting yourself or enduring the agony of doing boring stuff with boring people. Living is simply doing what makes you happy. You can live HARD without social booze n cake time. 🤜🤛