@beencalled

Follower of Jesus, Husband of Laura, Daddy of Ally, Author of @SavZombieNovel #amwriting #zombies Part-time Hashtagger

 Savannah, Ga
savannahzombienovel.com
Joined April 2009
  • Tweets4.4K
  • Following327
  • Followers150
161Media
Me waking up to glitter in and around the trash can after the kids let me sleep in
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4-year-old: I don't want any more long dresses. Me: Why not? 4: I can't run from zombies. Valid concern.
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Andy H.@AndyAsAdjective20 Nov 2016
whoever was the first to shorten "Richard" down to "Dick" must have really hated that guy
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Maker's Mark
@MakersMark9 Nov 2016
Every wax drip is different; every drop of bourbon is the same. #MakeItDelicious.
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I hope I can become big on Twitter so I can tweet "Tacos are dope" and get 50k RTs cuz honestly tacos are dope & more people need to know it
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Lady Lawya
@Parkerlawyer20 Nov 2016
On my way to the gym for a hard workout in preparation of all the food I'm going to eat this week. And by gym I mean Dunkin Donuts.
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jonathan@TheRealJmar17 Nov 2016
Heck No! We won't go! Unless you ask nicely. Then we may consider it. But if it really bothers you, we will. #AngryCanadianSigns
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Kara Klotz@KKlotzz16 Nov 2016
“When writers die they become books, which is, after all, not too bad an incarnation." -Jorge Luis Borges
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Potterheads! I just came across this amazing #HarryPotter website: hpcompanion.com/ Chapter by chapter fan art, discussion, etc
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The biggest challenge of parenthood isn’t learning to change a diaper. It's learning to swear inside your head.
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Ry Doon@RyDoon13 Nov 2016
If you're not a comedian, don't ever give a comic tips or suggestions about their work, unless you want them to hate you forever
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“If the Christian faith gets identified with a party, it reduces the Christian faith to a political position.”
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Rock@TheMichaelRock10 Nov 2016
The way people are reacting to the election proves they didn't pay attention to Schoolhouse Rock.
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I don't know why everyone is leaving the stock market today. At least 3 states legalized marijuana I'm investing in Doritos and Taco Bell.
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Rock@TheMichaelRock2 Nov 2016
Thanks for your political expertise, teenager. I'll put it where it belongs. *throws it in the trash*
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TWD spoilers: My son came home from school today and said: "I have VIP info on the walking dead! I know Abraham & Gwen died." #VIPinfo
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I'm really looking forward to this show SAMSUNG with Kristen Bell & Dax Shepard, been seeing promos for years. What channel is it on?
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Rock@TheMichaelRock2 Nov 2016
A lot of beta males running around pretending to be tough guys on the internet.
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To her 9mon old sister "Is ok. You don't hava be frade of tunder. I gochu." -Audrey #bigsisftw #2andincharge – at Bolingbrook, IL
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BadMummy@WineMummy29 Oct 2016
"People who stay home on a Friday night are losers" I say to myself, as I sit on the couch in pjs drinking wine and staring at my phone.
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