there is no perfect person, and there is no perfect spouse. i think one of the secrets to a successful marriage is truly understanding this. you know your person. you know their flaws, their weaknesses, their annoying habits, the parts of them that are "difficult to live with". and sometimes, after years of trying, you may have to accept that certain things about them may never completely change. maybe your spouse is forgetful, so you learn to remind them without turning every forgotten thing into a character indictment "you never pay attention", "you're always forgetful". maybe they are not naturally expressive, a little stubborn, slow to make decisions, or simply wired very differently from you. marriage cannot survive if two people are constantly trying to remodel each other into their own image of the perfect spouse. when you say you love someone, it means you know that person has a weakness and you choose not to weaponise it against them. loving them is knowing what "irritates" you about them and learning which things genuinely need to change, which things require patience, and which things you simply need to make room for. again, you will not find a flawless person. and if you spend your marriage fighting every imperfection in your spouse, you may eventually destroy something good in pursuit of something that does not exist. forget what people yap about nowadays. in marriage, you must be an understanding partner. advise them with kindness where change is necessary, but also learn to accommodate the harmless imperfections that come with being human. thank you!