mother/wife/girlfriend

New Hampshire
Joined June 2009
Heather L Nichols retweeted
Fucking hell. I hate staying at hotels that don't have Comedy Central. No @thedailyshow, no @colbertreport. Dammit. #firstworldproblems
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
Look, @fakedansavage. MT @JohnFugelsang An anchor on CNN - not making this up - just said that campaign Santorum 'exploded from the bottom.'
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
“@wiredpup: @fakedansavage so it's a tie between an asshole and the stuff that comes out of a well fucked asshole?” Looks that way.
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Bachmann has bowed out of the race. My twitter feed is at half Twast.
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Michele Bachmann predicts a miracle in Iowa: #NoNotSatifyingSexWithHerHusband #Jeez #SHameOnYou strib.mn/sM2WeK
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
My brother is a doctor & delivered a baby named Y'all-Jealous Jones today. This is not a joke. Y'ALL JEALOUS JONES. My brother wins 2012.
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
I'm watching Avatar. After reading Sex At Dawn, I don't believe for a moment that the Na'vi are monogamous.
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
Only 364 more shopping days until Christmas.
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in the meadow, Satan, as a preacher/we're compelled to call him "Parson Brown"/he says "are you married?" then all rhymes end/forever
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
If the existence of our species ever comes down to figuring out whose turn it is at a 4 way stop we're screwed.
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OK, I'LL say it. Newt will remain faithful because, NO ONE IS WANTING TO TAP THAT. #SomebodyHadToSayIt
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
Romney poll numbers giving magic underwear a bad name.
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
"Bump", said the headboard. "Fuck you, bed", I said. "I'm going to sleep in you no matter how passive aggressive you're going to get."
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
"Of course I take our vows seriously, darling! I forsook the shit of Calista last night. I forsook her so hard she could barely stand."
Heather L Nichols retweeted
Newt thought "forsaking" was a synonym for "fornicate," leading to tragic misinterpretation of "forsaking all others" vow.
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Replying to @fakedansavage
I'm game. Let me just plug in the Hitachi and pop some Altoids, and I'll take the ladies. @fakedansavage @kl8on #gaywaronchristmas
OH SOMEONE SHOVE A COCK IN SANTORUMS MOUTH ALREADY! #ICantTakeit #Teabate #GopDebate #TweetThePress
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
I took my kids to see the guy in the red suit today. That’s right, the Spider-Man on Hollywood Boulevard.
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
It's adorable watching Rick Perry say hateful things about gays in the military like he's still a real live candidate.
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Heather L Nichols retweeted
If you have been holding out for some of our Exotic Silk rope, now is the time! We just got a HUGE delivery and have it ready to ship!