Wife. Mother. Limp Hugger. Sometimes Blogger. My tweets: https://xitter.cf/t.co/ZHVfx6rdrr
Joined September 2015
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My husband brings me a cup of coffee every morning. Some might think that’s romantic but I’m pretty sure it’s self-preservation.
She Writes Good retweeted
The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.
Reminder to close all those Amazon tabs and to instead shop at local retailers. No excuses: I bought nearly all the gifts from my nephews’ wish lists while shopping in-person and sent them cross-country using USPS. I’m not in the Bay Area but if you are, here’s a great option.
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She Writes Good retweeted
What if you went to ET's planet and all of the other ET's were wearing clothes
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People in San Francisco are more likely to have a costume box than an earthquake kit.
She Writes Good retweeted
grandmas be like imma stay for a few days and reset your children back to factory settings
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After 10 months, I’m still going strong on my new year’s resolution of no typos this pear
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Smugly exits out of google maps 1 mile from my house “pfft, I think I can take it from here”
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I had day surgery today (nothing big) and they were like "don't make any important decisions in the next 24 hours bc you might not remember them." But I had to go grocery shopping. Later Morgan was like "you bought ... so much, like a lot, of cheese."
She Writes Good retweeted
PARENT PROTIP: Don't read that email from the school; save your energy for the follow-up with corrections they'll send in a few minutes.
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Hung out with some new people and after they left my girlfriend said, “…What if we had some kind of hand signal for when you should stop talking?”
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No one laughs or even smiles when I sing “Lord I was born a scramblin’ man” every time I make eggs but that’s the dad life, baby.
My elderly dad once asked me to show him how to use the internet. We sat down together and I pulled up Google. I searched for his name as an example. The first link was for a different man with his name. He was second.
He’s thought the internet is bullshit ever since.
