New York Sit Down comic. I got tired of people telling me to stop working dumb jobs and make people laugh, so here I am, still working dumb jobs

Brooklyn, NY
Joined April 2009
Being a comic that isn’t known is definitely tough, but not tougher than a beginner motivational speaker. what’s their open mic like ?
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Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
Leftover Coke is my band name
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Tell your parents that their email is NEVER case sensitive
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Ok…but have YOU ever had to replace an air pod? F*ck your commute I need this
Northbound A trains from Ozone Park-Lefferts Blvd are delayed while NYPD responds to an unauthorized person on the tracks near 104 St.
Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
Don’t tell me that p#%sy mines when I’m just in town.....
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Just got shushed by someone who is being louder than me. Visit me in prison.
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The CDC said to stop using this joke format
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Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
There was a herd of bison walking right toward me at @YellowstoneNPS today!
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If you live in a building with a doorman, across the street from the projects AND you have a golden-doodle, you would have been alright with slavery
Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
I just remembered when I was a kid my cousin made spaghetti and I asked for cheese on it and this man put a slice of kraft cheese on my damn spaghetti and he is in jail now
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Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
every day I wake up and begin the 16 hour process of getting ready for bed
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Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
Well...the Super Bowl is upon us. A tradition I’ve always loved. So much so I wrote a musical about it. Here’s a sneak peak of the opening song ❤️
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Isaiah Lorenzo retweeted
“oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree” -person getting fucked by a Christmas tree
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A long yawn and cars going around a racetrack....same sound
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im celibate bc i dont feel like cleaning my room
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me: hey do you want to sext? dude: ok me: if I died tomorrow do you think anyone would care?
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so glad we’re in quarantine so i don’t have to hear a bunch of guys explaining gamestop to girls at a bar
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The white women mad at Bernie sitting down gonna put their parents in a shitty nursing home first chance they get lol
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