Will follow if you tweet funny. I talk about golf a lot. I also write about and play golf quite a lot. Low round is 74 nbd. Follow if you like the stuff I say.

Indianapolis, IN
Joined February 2021
Between The Screws retweeted
Pastor: "God, keep me humble." God: "My pleasure."
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Tuna shaming is one of the worst kinds of shaming.
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Between The Screws retweeted
Women get SO HORNY when you talk to them about your fantasy football team. Trust me.
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Between The Screws retweeted
The audio on Wentworth cellphone videos always hits different. Sound just dances through those trees.
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Between The Screws retweeted
The fuck
Barstool Sports
@barstoolsports18 Aug 2022
Gabriel Moreno Blue Jays prospect just hit a ball 111 mph and it almost went THROUGH the wall @Starting9
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Between The Screws retweeted
Children's hospitals: "We do puberty blockers and genital surgeries for children." Journos: "Yasss! Gender-affirming care!" 🎉 Conservatives: "They do puberty blockers and genital surgeries for children." Journos: "Wow, that's targeted harassment and stochastic terrorism!" 😡
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Between The Screws retweeted
QUITE an anniversary today for the Dave Matthews Band 💩💩 😂😂 #PMSLive
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Between The Screws retweeted
Is it considered “mansplaining” if we just want it done right?
Can someone explain to me like I am 2 years old why I keep seeing British people like @piersmorgan and Justin Trudeau complaining about the “heat” in the UK? It’s only 40 degrees there. It’s 90 here. Really tells you all need to know about why the Redcoats collapsed in 1776.
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Between The Screws retweeted
me watching Cam Smith – at Bay Shore, NY
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Between The Screws retweeted
“Couldn’t be happier about my position as the parrot-Vizier to the Grand Sultan Jafar. You’ve asked me the same question three times. Hail Jafar.”
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Between The Screws retweeted
Doing some shopping in St. Andrews
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Between The Screws retweeted
Replying to @RiggsBarstool
Brooks on his way to LIV
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Between The Screws retweeted
Not to look in the rear view mirror but this is an incredibly hilarious answer in retrospect
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Between The Screws retweeted
Who gets it done? #USOpen
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Between The Screws retweeted
Going to be a great week for sports in Boston. I have two tickets to the @usopengolf, tickets to the @RedSox game and this signed bag for one lucky Boston fan. Retweet to win.
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Between The Screws retweeted
Greg Norman Saturday: "They couldn't squash us." Rory today:
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Between The Screws retweeted
21st PGA Tour win for Rory – “one more than someone else,” he said. Greg Norman. “That gave me a little bit of extra incentive today.”
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Between The Screws retweeted
Replying to @AlanShipnuck
"Ahhh yes..Mr. Shipnuck. Right this way, right this way."
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Between The Screws retweeted
Me: brutally murdered and found dumped on the side of the highway Two 35yr old women with a podcast: ok murder muffins we got a real oopy goopy spoopy story for you today! Squarespace ad: ARE YOU LOOKING TO EXPAND Y
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