Anybody here good with Java-the-script? How about Pee-HP?

Joined September 2013
@AngieWilliams45 Yes! As long as you file proper permits with authorities and fill out your 1040 (and have health insurance), you're free!
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"Dallas Buyers Club" reminds us that the @usgov has a long history of killing people for their own good. #Obamacare
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What's Obamacare+, you ask? It's just like Obamacare, only with insurance company bailouts. Also, the webstie still doesn't work.
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Love #Obamacare? (Wait, really?!) Er, we mean, yeah if you love Obamacare, you're going to love Obamacare+.
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@shoutsout2tonio Look, it's real simple: Take your handouts, or be prepared to slave away for those who do. It's only fair.
Good to see you back, @HealthDotGov. We were starting to worry that this whole healthcare thing wasn't going to work out!
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Score for us in ol' Virginny!
Hey, what happened to @HealthDotGov? How are we ever gonna get the website going now!?!?!?
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Numbers. How do they work? xitter.cf/WhiteHouse/status/3956…
RT the good news: Since 2009, we've reduced the deficit by more than half —> go.wh.gov/GVsFBL #Progress,
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So, yeah, joint defense with New Zealand's a *thing* now! Aren't we great?
U.S., New Zealand Announce Expanded Defense Cooperation. go.usa.gov/WgTk
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Anybody here know Ph Pee? #glitch
Replying to @GrayManGary
@GrayManGary Did you really just report @usgov to the @BarackObama account? You spineless bitch. YOU are what's wrong with America. Pussy.
We shouldn't be surprised that those eager to bring back sedition laws would be just as eager to censor others.
@paulashcomedy Sadly, no. We have to show up at our desks. Sorta.
@KBake_2 @Ovaaay We'd like to introduce you to our innovative "drone" program...
@CycleViewCharts @BarackObama @SenHarryReid @WhiteHouse You nuts? We hate those guys!
@Kate_Becks_ We didn't quit. We just needed a little "time out".
Sorry we've been away, folks! Having some "web" problems. Heh. We knew we shouldn't have upgraded to ios7!