circumventing immortality: a manifesto
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Joined August 2013
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just saw a black hatchback zooming erratically down lygon st in brunswick with the licence plate ‘HVOLK’. can only assume this is a reference to the nazi idea of ‘herrenvolk’ or ‘master race’. @slackbastard, @tom_tanuki et al - anyone else seen or heard about this before?
i yearn for simpler times when petrol was a dollar a litre, climate change was reversible, and “cbd” referred to a central business district, not semi-legal weed tincture
having recently switched to using tongs as the default cooking tool, i am now completely consumed by jealousy & awe of how fucking convenient the life of a crab must be
yeah lizzo’s crystal flute is cool but we must boycott the discourse until the humble & versatile clarinet gets equal or greater representation
wait, so, you’re telling me that burial’s just gonna keep releasing new music, and i’m just gonna keep listening to it & loving it deeply with my whole heart like some kind of tender dumbass?? that’s just how it’s gotta be, huh???
the collapse of neoliberalism won't be won by socialist insurgency or united people's struggle. it'll be won when bitter, long-standing rivals, Private School vs Harbour Views, duke it out in a final showdown for the title of capital supremacy, destroying the world in the process
this is the photograph our national broadcaster has chosen to break the news about australia’s new opposition leader & i must admit this powerful image commands nothing but my utmost respect
losing my mind at pics of tony wearing this Piping Hot-esque floral as shorts & 3/4 length culottes—makes me think of him as a plucky marge in Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield, sewing & resewing the same pair of kmart pants to fit in w/ the blokes at mosman golf club
housemate has refused to make eye contact with me for the third day running & i’m starting to suspect that she may have taken to heart the absolutely disgusting, hate-filled slurs i scream every night at the moths that fly unbidden into my bedroom
Just a taste of overpolicing in 2019, where festival-goers now expect to be strip searched and have their ticket (or cigarettes or gum) confiscated even when no drugs are found on them. This is not aberration, this has been consistent police procedure since at least 2017.
[NSW Police press conference]
Police Commissioner: we are in the midst of an epidemic. the people of NSW should be on high alert for *checks notes* wrigley's juicy fruit
just sprinted, tripping over myself like a disney cartoon, to catch a lift & was about to thank the kind stranger who oh so politely held open the elevator doors for me til i realised it was none other than racist mouthbreather mark latham in classic dirty polo & oversized shorts
never thought i'd live to see a more pathetic use of the black [redacted] bar than in the mueller report and yet ... here we are
