@tomgrennell

i would like to invoke my right to jester’s privilege your honor

Joined June 2014
  • Tweets14.2K
  • Following287
  • Followers581
1KMedia
Got bored the other night and decided to convince @courtneymauss that someone signed her up for an automated gnome fact service
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Mostly I want to know if anyone sees my tweets with how inactive I am so I can know if it’s worthwhile to promote some fun stuff here
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Hello is this thing on
89%I, your follower, am here
11%No, The Man silenced you
9 votes • Final results
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dishing out loose gravy to trick or treaters this year in my ongoing attempt to get shot
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holy cow more like aMOOn am I right fellas
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Do you think a bee has ever unknowingly stung an allergic person and watched them die like. Oh shit. Fuck. Shit. I just wanted to scare you. Wake up man come on. Please wake up. Fuck. I have priors. I can’t go back. Shit.
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man who becomes invisible under the full moon. werewaldo
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Damn this fanfic shit is easy
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If a genie gave me one wish not because I freed her from her lamp but just because I’m a solid dude I’d wish for everyone to forget what sneezes are. Imagine the adjustment period if suddenly that was just a new thing we all did. Chaos. Mayhem. Pandemonium. Delightful.
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I like how French people get a little horny whenever they eat. When I look at food I also get boner petite.
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Imma be real, when I say “I hate Al”, it’s all generative Al. When ppl say, “oh I get it for art, but it’s so helpful for emails!” I just interpret that as “I’m too lazy to read and write my own emails!”
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i never considered that scooby doo could be bisexual. perhaps im a bad person
Furry Bait In Media 🐾
@FurryBaitMediaAug 2
Scooby Doo Where Are You comic, issue 130
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Hi did I mention I wrote a silly short Looney Tunes-inspired urban fantasy novel that you can get for free or for a donation to my children’s Disneyland fund chaoticdumb.itch.io/mischief…

Mischief and Mayhem by chaoticdumb

chaoticdumb.itch.io
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we’re here we’re queer we’re hanging on for life comma dear
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I’m truly doing you all a disservice by not using this account and for that I am sorry
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what’s up guys, this is my new LG dishwasher. the front is glass so you can see what’s going on. check it out, it’s about to hit spin cycle. [we all gather in as the racks begin to rotate at dizzying speeds, smashing all my fine china to smithereens in an instant] it’s smart:)
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tshirt that says "im not an archmage im the mage who arched up"
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Hello pls consider taking a look at the Walk to Cure Arthritis fundraiser for Penny! Sharing or donating could really help :) events.arthritis.org/teams/4…

2026 Walk to Cure Arthritis - Raleigh, NC

One in four Americans have arthritis. Support the Arthritis Foundation and make a difference in the fight to find a cure for the nation’s #1 cause of disability.

events.arthritis.org
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Tom’s going to banana ball today with his friends and I made them flags lol
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in the same way that good friends will go to a wedding and then propose and have an ambush wedding on the spot, i intend to schedule my suicide for my friend’s wedding, but my +1 will be a pastor ready to administer my last rites with a crew on standby to bury me under the venue
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going to spend the whole night talking about my big plans for the future and how i feel invincible and nothing can stop me so when i die unexpectedly and nastily everyone will know it is a murder and i will lock the doors so they know it had to have been One Of Them
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