Enough about TikTok, how will you recover our stolen pandas? #GOPDebate

Moderator: How will you repeal Obamacare? Pence: Pass. #GOPDebate

FACT: Mike Pence has never answered a question in his life. #GOPDebate

Would Vivek be a good president? Don’t know, but that guy can really enunciate words loudly. #GOPDebate

Siri during #amazonalexa outage. @alexa99 #Alexa #AlexaDown #AmazonAlexaDown

“If you could have one item from Star Wars…” Me, age 8: Lightsaber. Me, age 48: Bacta Tank.

#BUFvsJAX flyover.

For hands-free snacking add Reese’s Pieces to your mask and use it as a feedbag. Follow me for more pandemic survival tips. #WednesdayWisdom #MaskUp

First responders: "We need tests, masks, ventilators, and sleep." White House: "Here's a jet parade." #PressBriefing #PressConference #Coronavirus

QUARANTINE DAY 14: Began investigation to determine if Dr. Fouci is actually Howard Baskin.

QUARANTINE DAY 12: I used my Roomba to deliver treats to my cat in the next room. #QuarantineLife #SocialDistancing #CoronaLockdown #QuarantineCats

The 2020 quarantine will result in a boom of babies in 2021. We shall call them “Coronials”. #COVID19 #coronavirus

“I, Robot” in Spanish is “Yo, Robot”. #FunFact

“The days of crafting brands without incorporating a #CX design mindset are drawing to a close.” #uxdesign fastcompany.com/90442611/bra…

Actual footage of #DougCollins #ImpeachmentHearings

This is gold. #ImpeachmentHearings #impeachmentDebate

50 points to @chrislhayes for working “rural juror” into his newscast.

#Jags new QB Minshew looks like that guy from back home who had a Trans Am with t-tops and was asst mgr at the bowling alley. #DUUUVAL