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derek

@this_derek

A shaved Sasquatch hiding in Hawaii.

Joined August 2010
  • Tweets1.5K
  • Following262
  • Followers45
Ate an edible, drank hard alcohol and now I'm eating black olives off my fingers while sitting on the floor. #FridayNight
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You ever have people in your life and think "I don't know how we got here but I'm glad we did"
I'm watching below decks and I've never wanted to sink a boat more.
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Why did nobody tell me about that new @soulglophl album till NOW! Straight bangers!
Replying to @MakDPostmodern
@MakDPostmodern its called makana beer. So close...
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New animatronics look lit!
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missed opportunity if someone doesn't name their band gazpacho police
The real freaks are the ppl that back in to their parking spot at Costco.
James Webb Deez nuts
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I must be drunk, I ordered a t-shirt off of Etsy.
This playboi carti show is lit!
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Twitch chat is like Stephen Hawkins but without the intellect.
Yassss #SpotifyWrapped open.spotify.com/wrapped-202…
So I guess they added @michaelalfox as a new villager in AC😀
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Spent the morning adding TV shows and movies to my list that I'll never watch. I've never felt more accomplished.
Little known fact: I'm the inside man.
YASSSSS
SARAH SQUIRM (@SarahSquirm) profile pictureSARAH SQUIRM
@SarahSquirm27 Sep 2021
🤪🤪 SNL just made a HUGE mistake!! 🤪🤪
The reaction to @SeanSJordan first pick in the zaddy draft was MAGIC!
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And I agree! Steve Harvey is a total Zaddy. He👏shaves 👏his👏head👏. Total Zaddy move!
No more sugar for these boogers! Be careful out there everyone.
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