sperm racing s1 begins 001 - enhanced vs natural

Sperm racing has no coasting phase. At this scale, drag dominates inertia. Stop beating the tail and there's essentially no glide. The weirdest part isn't the microscope. It's the physics. math.uwaterloo.ca/~mdunphy/p…

This graphic is extremely misleading. From our internal research, semen retention does not lead to better fertility markers. Cotton underwear for men is also not the most ideal, especially in the Summer. Warm baths are not the best recommendations either…

“I came here to win… but I also have an easy way out.”

imagine losing a sperm race and your opponent says “no worries, it happens to a lot of guys.”

A useful reminder for sperm racing videos: show the setup and make the finish understandable. Give viewers something concrete to follow before asking them to pick a racer.

Pablo lost confidence when he saw the cup. Gabe gave himself a 10/10.

Would you rather follow one sperm racer through a season, or watch a new matchup every time?

a sperm racing press conference where the coach refuses to discuss his starting lineup.

number 2 is how you get banned from a furniture store.

A fight for third can carry a season. That's the part worth borrowing for sperm racing: returning competitors, points that carry over, and a reason to watch the next heat.

We got tried of racing so we made gooning the new way to get cardio

sperm racing needs a commentator who can say “he’s got incredible pace” without laughing. who’s getting the mic?

AYO

Sperm Racing haiku: the crowd holds its breath two tails chase a finish line the spreadsheet can wait

fictional sperm racing classified: rival wanted. ideal candidate says “it’s just a game” only after winning.

Which commentary style would make Sperm Racing funniest?

telling sperm racing to “stick to sports” is conceding a lot.

cheering for the DVD logo to hit the corner was sperm racing preseason.