Abbey

get in bitches we're going to reflect on our past and work on being the best version of ourselves

That .5 seconds in the zoom meeting when everyone has said goodbye and we’re all frantically navigating to the “Leave Meeting” button is the most uncomfortable thing but I love it

I like this take, but wouldn’t it be counterintuitive to the many instances of god emphasizing unwavering obedience?

god: “Hey kill ur kid for me” abraham: kill my..what..no” god: “if u wanna roll w/ me kill ur kid” abraham: “I mean…oh - oKay” *abraham ties his son to a rock for sacrifice, sharpens his knife and tells his kid he about to die” god: “oh stop it heheh I was just fuckin w u”

Men from your hometown be like: can’t talk, building my empire And it’s always a SoundCloud career

There’s a brewery at my local library

everything is a brewery now

a quiet peaceful Sunday morning <<< screaming What Do We Do With A Drunken Sailor in the pasta aisle of Aldi

I literally just accidentally pressed unfollow as I posted that tweet response HAHHAA

I was kinda hoping this said add friend so I could chew you out 😂😂😂🤡🤡

Nothin hits quite like that childhood disillusionment you experience in your twenties

Not me checking my bank account twice a day as if 100k is just suddenly going to appear overnight from the heavens