My tummy is the snack capital of the USA

Guys I just laid the biggest egg today and when I say laid I mean pooped and when I say egg I mean poop

gonna watch Oppenheimer backwards as a tribute to memento

show me you support workers by sending me pictures of your social security number

yes ofc the celebrity that doesn’t know i exist will immediately fall in love with my charming personality

Never the main course always the snack

why is it that when we see a dog with 3 legs we feel sorry but when we see a man with 3 legs we feel intimidated

im tryna get my boochie scratched

They better make 13 spiderverse movies so Swae Lee finally gets a full album

Is she an Indian car bc her tata’s nano

My YouTube algorithm has transit good videos next to loud car good videos

Head in the clouds emailed me only because I’m Asian

Baby it’s the time of the month when u snooze all Instagram suggested reels for 30 days

No I’m not great at texting back I’m just addicted to my phone

it’s so crazy 9/11 happened on September 11th what a crazy coincidence

People really saying they’re having a quarter life crisis at age 25 like hold your cocky ass I know how much you drink you ain’t living past 66

anyone got any catch phrases for sale? used is fine I heard they depreciate the moment they leave your mouth

smart people in 1962: let’s send someone on the moon smart people in 2023: where can i place the in-app purchase button on my app

I didn’t get the fucking memo that I was supposed to leave the city this weekend

JesThey/Them