hello seve . art made by the incredible @exe_gugs, thank you, I loved it!

Well, I wasn’t going to talk about this, but it’s been weighing on my mind. A few days ago, I was out and nearly got stabbed, it was just a random street fight, a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I managed to get away and run off. It was a huge shock; I went home and calmed down, but days later, I found myself thinking... I could have died, and no one would have ever known. I only have one friend in real life, everyone else I know is online, and I’ve really been dwelling on that... I could die, and no one would ever know what happened to me. So I found myself wondering if I’ve played any role in this life, perhaps in someone else’s, at least, but I believe that once I die, no one would remember me. I feel like I’m "just a fleeting memory."

With each passing day, the environment I live in is making me ill. I’m far away from the people I love, which leaves me feeling anxious and needy. I’m becoming exhausted; university is draining my passion for creating, and there’s this sense of loneliness. I desperately want to get out of here and be happy.

btw I have a priv account, oomfs only @/nighttimeseve

Distance is truly painful; every time I think about it, my chest aches, from not being near, from not being able to hug, kiss, or hold her hands. But I believe this is only temporary, and that soon I’ll be able to look into her eyes and tell her how much I love her.

yag xes where?

I think they need some attention, guys

Oh my god, I’ve attracted conservatives to my account, LOL

Sometimes I think this anger toward myself stems from the environment I live in, constant arguments, a lack of empathy, a distant family. My relationship with my parents has never been easy; sometimes I wonder if things would be different if it weren’t this way. I know we shouldn’t get used to abuse, but unfortunately, I have nowhere else to go. So, I just use marijuana and cigarettes as an escape valve. When I was younger, I also used hard drugs, LSD, Xanax, MDMA, cocaine, all to try and forget the horrible moments I face every single day.

Being bisexual and non-binary, while simultaneously not being accepted by my family, watching my mother and father vote for someone who condemns my very existence, and hearing my mother argue that the former president has the right to hate LGBT people, honestly makes me fear for my life; I know I will never be respected or accepted...

I can’t wait for this whole political issue to be over, because yesterday I had a huge argument with my mom about it

And someday I will spontaneously combust, yayyyy

Today, more than ever, I feel even less like I belong in this country... The situation in Portugal isn’t exactly great either, but I can’t imagine people there voting against my very existence... More than anything, I want to leave this place or go back home; I’ve never felt comfortable here, and today, more than ever... I feel terrible living here

Sometimes I look at my university and remember that I returned to school because, in 2024, I wanted to be a better person for my ex, all while my depression was at its peak, and while I was working in a toxic environment where I was harassed and raped. Returning to university was a good thing; sometimes, as I walk across campus, I’m reminded of that year, and I feel happy that I’m still here and can see that I’m getting better.

sleeping while hugging my pillow because there’s an ocean keeping us apart

03/29/31, I wonder if I’ll get everything done by then

There’s no way I would ever do what my parents did to me, they took me out of my own country and brought me to a place where, to this day, I suffer from being so far from home and being in a completely fucked-up situation

I finished Life is Strange: Before the Storm, and this is how I’m feeling right now:

I’m happy to have friends with whom the friendship remains, even when we don’t exchange many messages for a long time, all because we understand that life can sometimes be too hectic to send messages constantly.