Ryan Stephens retweeted
Parenting is a lot of asking your kids to develop qualities you're still working on yourself.
Patience. Discipline. Kindness. Resilience.
The trick is remembering they're learning from how you practice those things, not just how you preach them.
We've made it incredibly easy to avoid discomfort.
• Bored? Scroll.
• Stressed? Drink.
• Tired? Order in.
• Lonely? Get online.
But a life spent avoiding discomfort eventually becomes pretty uncomfortable.
Parenting is a lot of asking your kids to develop qualities you're still working on yourself.
Patience. Discipline. Kindness. Resilience.
The trick is remembering they're learning from how you practice those things, not just how you preach them.
A comedian, possibly the biggest comedian in the world right now, spent 7 minutes mostly making fun of himself, but made one comment about women’s gym attire and now half the country is mad?
You know you can just opt out of the divisive news cycle and go build something, right?
Went to gymnastics with my daughter tonight. She got bumped to the next level.
Lyla: “You told me to ask what was required to move up. Then, we practiced those skills, then I told them I was ready and demonstrated it. And I did it!”
Me: “That’s how jobs work, too.”
Ryan Stephens retweeted
Move to a city where your neighbors wave at you, there's block parties in the cul-de-sac, you know half the people in the restaurant on Friday night, your kids make life long friends in Little League, and everyone looks out for each other.
Ryan Stephens retweeted
Me after sleeping on the uncomfortable couch in the hospital after my wife gives birth
Ryan Stephens retweeted
The dishes are in the sink because people ate.
The shoes are by the door because people came home.
The toys are scattered everywhere because people were happy.
Some of the mess is proof of a good life.
Stay grateful.
Too many of you think you’re going to achieve joy, or some level of status, through suffering.
All you’re really doing is building a habit of suffering.
Instead, focus on the things where you enjoy the process. Then, the joy precedes the success.
It's surprisingly easy to build a good life.
It's surprisingly difficult to avoid the thousand little distractions trying to pull you away from it.
It's amazing how many problems become more manageable after:
• A long walk
• A hard workout
• A good night's sleep
• A conversation with someone you love
Not every problem, but more than you'd think.
Apparently they fixed the algorithm and mutuals are showing up again, so I figured I'd poke my head back in.
I haven't been around much since last summer—mostly just living life in the real world. Started a new job (coming up on a year already 🤯), chasing three young kids, coaching youth sports, and selling sports cards with my oldest.
If it's been a while since we've interacted, say hi. I'd genuinely love to hear what you've been up to.
Ryan Stephens retweeted
The Sandlot has the single greatest vision of American life ever put on film.
This scene is what it’s all about. 🇺🇸
It's funny how many things become luxuries as you get older.
An empty calendar. A full night's sleep.
A long conversation with an old friend.
A Saturday with nowhere to be.
Ryan Stephens retweeted
don’t know how to explain Texas properly…
It feels like America turned up to maximum settings.
Ryan Stephens retweeted
Babies are the best.
I can't believe I ever bought any of the anti-natalist propaganda when I was young.
You'll never be ready.
Have the baby anyway.
Then have many more.
Ryan Stephens retweeted
If you want to "raise a D1 athlete" here's what works:
1. Stop trying to raise a D1 athlete
Support your kid. Let them play whatever they want to play. Drive them to practice
But it's got to come from them. They've got to want it. You can't force it.
2. Have great genetics
Ryan Stephens retweeted
"If I told you there was one free thing you could do every Sunday that would make your kids happier, healthier, smarter, and closer to you, you'd think I was selling something."
Take your kids to church regularly. I don't care if you believe. The data is so lopsided that skipping it is the parenting equivalent of refusing vegetables because you don't like the taste.
Grades. Religious teens get As at almost twice the rate of nonreligious teens. In a class of 100, that's 24 A-students instead of 14. Church gives a kid the same academic boost as being born rich instead of poor.
College. Working-class religious kids earn bachelor's degrees at double the rate of their nonreligious peers. Middle-class kids do it at 1.5x the rate. For families without a trust fund, this is one of the most powerful forms of upward mobility social scientists have measured.
Character. Religious teens are far less likely to lie, cheat, or do things they hope their parents never find out about. They're more likely to care about racial equality, the elderly, and the poor. They reject the idea that morality is whatever works for you in the moment. That kind of kid doesn't happen by accident. It's built.
Closeness. 60% of parents of religious teens say they feel "extremely close" to their kid, compared to 50% of nonreligious parents. The kids report the same thing back. They get along better with their parents, talk about hard stuff, and actually want to spend time with their family.
Despair. Religious teens are dramatically less likely to be depressed, anxious, lonely, or feel that life is meaningless. 90% of devoted religious teens never binge drink, compared to 41% of the disengaged. Economists named the modern epidemic "deaths of despair." Regular church attendance is one of the strongest known buffers against it. Parents are spending fortunes trying to solve teen mental health. The most evidence-backed intervention is free.
Purpose. Religious young adults report higher purpose, gratitude, life satisfaction, and resilience. These are the exact traits every parent says they want their kid to have.
Here's why it works. Affluent families already surround their kids with networks of stable, accomplished adults through neighborhoods, schools, and parents' colleagues. Working and middle-class families usually don't. A congregation is often the last institution in American life that puts your kid in weekly contact with dozens of stable, employed, sober adults who know their name. It used to be called "a village." Now it barely exists outside of churches.
"But I don't believe." Your kid doesn't need your theology. They need you to show up.
"But church is boring." So is sitting through a kindergarten music recital. Parenting is the deliberate choice to be bored on purpose for someone you love.
There's a church within 15 minutes of nearly every American home. You don't need money, connections, or credentials to walk in. Nothing else in this country will surround your kid with engaged adults, teach them moral seriousness, and give them a stable weekly rhythm at zero cost.
You already drive them to practices that produce far less. The free thing on Sunday produces more, on more dimensions, than almost anything else you do as a parent.
You don't have to believe anything. You just have to take them.
Ryan Stephens retweeted
New newsletter: MODERN FATHERHOOD WOULD BE UNRECOGNIZABLE TO A 1950'S DAD
Compared to their Boomer parents, childcare time among Millennial dads has more than doubled.
Compared to their Silent Generation grandparents, it’s nearly quadrupled.
You will be hard-pressed to find any part of day-to-day modern life that has changed more in the last half-century than the way today’s parents—and fathers, in particular—spend their time.
The new American dad is more present and more exhausted—but also, more satisfied with life. What's behind this half-century transformation? Today's piece combines history, economic analysis, and gorgeous charts galore from @AzizSunderji















