Son of my father Badass Entrepreneur Cerebral Assassin Cofounder, Mzalendo Admiral, #SalmaSquadron Emperor of Sarcastica https://xitter.cf/t.co/e5N7ul87y8
Nairobi
Joined February 2008
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There’s a small girl in the hood who comes down to watch me gear up 🏍️ in the mornings and asks me the all sorts of questions from entry level “why don’t planes fall out of the sky / why do ships not sink” to profound “what size of shoes does God wear / how tall is he”
After the unfortunate fiasco where Agricultural Economist James Opiyo astounded Kenyans on TV with breathtaking ignorance of his docket, whenever he speaks in public now a retinue of large men is always standing behind him ready to create a diversion in case he says nonsense
I’m volunteering to help this baga move out of State House come next year. I am even ready to escort him all the way to Sugoi to make sure he gets there safely.
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Alaaaa?
🚨🇪🇹 BREAKING: Reports indicate that during recent security operations in northern Ethiopia, the ENDF and the TPF uncovered a major weapons cache from TPLF remnants in the Tigray region.
🇰🇪 Interestingly, among the captured munitions is Kenya Ministry of Defence (MoD)-labelled ammunition, specifically 14.5×114mm API cartridges with contract numbers matching Eastern African military supplies.
This finding raises serious questions regarding foreign involvement, regional defense logistics, and how military equipment destined for Kenya ended up in insurgent hands within Ethiopia.
Ivar The Boneless retweeted
The Supreme Court burns to the ground in Albania, Parliament and the Department of Education has been stormed, the Prime Minister is in hiding and the country is effectively in the hands of the rebels.
Albania rejects blatant corruption and their country being sold.
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Tiger Woods Unimpressed With Roadster As He's Flipped Dozens Of Vehicles buff.ly/dUGarJ0
Apparently, “which half?” is not the correct response to the declaration “there a half naked woman running around outside!”
Something is off about these photos …
Ethnic hatred, divisiveness and anger are no longer political currency in Kenya. Kenyans want agenda-based politics, and the Kenya Kwanza manifesto is the only agenda on the table.
That is why Kenyans continue to hold us accountable for the promises we made in our manifesto. We are delivering on those commitments, including affordable housing, universal healthcare and agricultural revitalisation, among others. And the results speak for themselves.
Addressed residents of Tapach in Pokot South Constituency, West Pokot County.
“Harutaki siasa ya matusi” and other stories 🚮
Niliona mwingine anaitwa Mr. Empty alienda kulaunch chama inaitwa The Empty Party. Akatoka hapo moja kwa moja hadi kwa bar. Mara ya mwisho tulimwona na Koffi Olomide na meza imejaa ile pombe kali ya jina mbili mbili sijui Johny Walker, sijui Jack Natembeya… mko na kibarua. Mtu mwenyewe ni empty, chama ni empty. Alafu anaanza kuitisha wamama shilingi kumi kumi. Hiyo chama imekwama kwa bar.
President Ruto in West Pokot
It takes a big man to insult those anonymous folk who provide him with essential services.
Try this with someone with access to your food. “Fire in the hole!” will quickly mean something very different to you!
