Writer & editor for hire. // @TheAVClub @decider @GQMagazine etc // DMs open // Pretty good with words but words won't save your life.
Brooklyn, NY
Joined January 2009
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If you wanna check out my Substack, I belated put up an annotated top 20 list of my favorite movies of 2023, with links to where I wrote about them, if applicable. (It is applicable to most of the top 10, at least!)
STREET FIGHTER (1994).... STREET FIGHTER: THE LEGEND OF CHUN-LI (2009).... STREET FIGHTER (2026)............... FIGHT! decider.com/2026/10/19/the-b…
See I do think it would be beneficial if this guy specifically was expected to go someplace basically every day, preferably without internet, maybe a mine of some sort
Hahahaha I forgot that in the 2009 STREET FIGHTER: LEGEND OF CHUN-LI movie, M. Bison is ALSO the bad guy, as in the 1994 and 2026 versions, but he's played by Neal McDonough who interprets him as being, you know, a Neal McDonough type of guy
In STREET FIGHTER, curly-haired Kyle Mooney plays a dork who simps for Chun-Li, so, you know... it's nice to feel seen. #representationmatters
This was actually a transitional season because Fey, Dratch, Parnell, and Sanz were very much of a previous era; note that Samberg, Wiig, Sudeikis, and Hader were all featured players (and admittedly probably the best group of featured players ever). Season 32 is arguably better.
32 has the leanest cast of 21st century SNL, with 11 people, one largely ceremonial (Hammond), and another mostly on Update from that point forward (Meyers). No featured players, and they don't start leaning too heavily on Wiig yet. Plus Poehler and Rudolph are still there.
Oh, am I the first Google result for "SNL seasons ranked"???? insidehook.com/television/ev…
Let's just freeze it here (delighted by Zach Cherry in part because my sister knew him a little and my mom clocked "Meg's friend" when we watched TEENAGE SEX AND DEATH AT CAMP MIASMA)
This apparently reminded someone to unfollow me on Letterboxd which.......... fair
Hey I'm just saying I'm currently one Letterboxd follower away from 2,000 and maybe that follower could be you letterboxd.com/rockmarooned/
Oh also I did a little WHALEFALL review. Outside the whale, it gets a little dicey. decider.com/2026/10/16/whale…
Hey I'm just saying I'm currently one Letterboxd follower away from 2,000 and maybe that follower could be you letterboxd.com/rockmarooned/
It's cute that there's a tradition of filmmakers doing cute little ads with congratulations for breaking each other's box office records but just once I'd like someone to go super aggro with it. A shot of Payakan leaping out of the water emblazoned with YOU MOTHERFUCKERS CHEATED
What good is Sony having the Spider-Man rights if they can't place an ad with Spidey flipping the bird at the Avengers wishing them luck getting to $900 million domestic on DOOMSDAY??
I have no doubt that Soderbergh will perfectly execute Reeves' vision for THE BATMAN PART II and hope Reeves gets through whatever he's facing, and gets to make PART III (or whatever he wants!), and also that Soderbergh then does a Catwoman movie as a spiritual sequel to KIMI.
Sorry but feeling like it's basically fine for Kelly Clarkson to go off on some indie store because you think the owner(s) are annoying Brooklyn dweebs (??) is weaponized poptimism, babes
Wait...how is it that Netflix isn't giving the Anya Taylor-Joy/Chris Evans movie a theatrical release but finagled trailers for that Peter Berg's War Is Grit Part 17 movie into AMCs???
I wear a horror t-shirt every day in October until I run out, part 1: featuring the waning days of September Beard #horrorlifestyle
I wear a horror t-shirt every day in October until I run out, part 2: post-beard, I wore the FORBIDDEN FRUITS teeth to the dentist and Hailee to get blood drawn (the tech said it was "scary" but recognized HS the I said it was from SINNERS)
