Ravi

Some ideas to consider in middle age, in no particular order: 1/ The home you live in matters more than you think. Some spaces and locations create inner noise & agitation in us. Other spaces and locations help quiet our inner noise. Spend the money & time to get a home that creates quietness & holistic comfort. It is worth it. 2/ If you feel good when you criticize someone, you might enjoy the short term self righteousness and validation you get, but if it becomes a habit, you will likely never find joy in the life you have created. 3/ Don’t look up to anyone. 4/ Constantly upgrading your social circle (in terms of their success, wealth, fame, connections, etc.) might feel good in the short term, but just leads to long term emptiness. 5/ Contrary to popular wisdom, you are not the average of your 5 closest friends. But you can be the average of the 5 books you spend the most time with. If you want to be “successful”, constantly trying to upgrade the former costs you your soul, while doing the latter costs you less than $200 and some time. 6/ If it is important, don’t read with the intent to consume or to repeat or to feel smart. Read with the intent to discover yourself. 7/ Most of what we experience and assume as imposter syndrome is not real imposter syndrome. Everyone experiences fear and self-doubt. That is not imposter syndrome. It just means you care enough to do a good job and are self-aware enough to know where you need to grow. 8/ If something within you is constantly gnawing at you, constantly telling you that you are an imposter who will be found out, pay attention to it because you probably are. Real imposter syndrome arises when you aren’t self-aware and your outward confidence far exceeds your inner competence. 9/ Achieving your “full potential” based on society’s definition of success sounds like a great idea but is actually not a great idea. To truly create the best conditions for long-term joy & happiness, you should aim to be just slightly less successful than you actually could be. This delta creates room for things that are more important & lasting than achieving your full potential. 10/ When you really think about it real hard, it is quite stupid to feel proud of something you were born with and had no choice in the matter. 11/ We are born with more things than our ego would like us to admit. 12/ When a politician or a prominent leader tells you that you should feel proud of something (and it turns out that you were born with it), you are being manipulated. They really want you to feel this pride because it serves their agenda. And they will stop at no lengths. 13/ The vast majority of parents manipulate their children constantly & that manipulation continues well beyond the toddler years, for at least the first couple of decades of the child’s life. If you think you never do this or no longer do it, you are likely not thinking hard enough. 14/ If it doesn’t resonate, either ask or ignore, don’t argue. 15/ If you are old-enough and still blame your parents for who you are, be sure to also blame your grandparents for who your parents were, and your great grandparents for who your grandparents were, and ... ... ... You get the picture. 16/ There is a big difference between expensive and costly. 17/ When you laugh at previous generations for their ignorance or brutality, you might as well laugh at yourself while you are at it. On behalf of future generations. 18/ If you are already happy, the most foolish thing you can do is to put all your energy towards becoming happier. 19/ Past a certain point & beyond temporary bumps, a person’s baseline happiness level dictates whether they are happy, much more than their external situation. Therefore, the most important type of self-improvement is whatever helps raise the baseline happiness level you are capable of. 20/ The only 2 questions you need for endless self-discovery: i) Why does this emotion exist? ii) What is causing this thought? ~