If a firm announced a machine that: - Runs on grass, bracken, straw and hedge trimmings - Works on land no tractor can climb - Turns cellulose into steak, milk, butter and cheese - Fertilises the field it stands in, while standing in it - Builds topsoil instead of eating it - Runs on rain and sunlight, no cable, no charger - Repairs itself and builds its own replacement every year - Clears scrub, holds back wildfire and keeps the hill open - Leaves behind leather, wool, tallow, gelatin, bone and 100 other products - Has been in continuous service for 10,000 years without a recall It would take every environmental award going and the chief executive would be knighted. It is called a ruminant. We have a cow, a sheep, and a goat already doing all of it, for nothing, on ground that grows nothing else. The plan is to tax them by the burp.