Alex Cottone

Positions is good but I think what we really needed was a Fergalicious for 2020.

When you come back to Twitter only to find that everyone you follow now has an OnlyFans and your feed is just butts and dicks...

Wait, what’s the point of Twitter?

Hi Twitter, I’m back.

SSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUBBBBBBBBBBBBBTTTTTTTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTT

When crackheads meet other crackheads on the train and become friends it really makes you think... should I do crack to make friends?

Excuse me world but $8 is WAY too much to pay for deodorant!

Guy on the train thought I was someone he knew so he gave me a firm shoulder shove. My clumsy ass toppled to the floor. Feeling good y'all.

Me when a straight guy goes in for a handshake... #gayboyproblems

Here's an idea for the MTA: let's get better speakers for the trains/stations so that we can actually understand the conductors say.

Thanks women for LITERALLY giving me LYFE! #InternationalWomensDay

Is it weird that I still feel like a child when talking to other adults?

Some days you just gotta sit on the toilet and listen to musicals. #gayslay

Feel like I'm always holding back a twitter rant about how disgusting Tomi Lahren is.