@kyleayers

Comedian from Conan @neverseenitshow @boastrattle show on Sirius XM, clips, album, and me active on better social media sites in links ⤵️

 Los Angeles, CA
linktr.ee/kyleayers
Joined March 2009
  • Tweets29K
  • Following2K
  • Followers17.4K
3.2KMedia
Aaron Rodgers would fall in love with Elizabeth Holmes in thirty seconds.
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I hate when I come up with an incredible idea and then I find out it's already been done. Just happened to me w "6 7" I can't believe someone beat me to it.
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Might be unpopular but higher seeds choosing their opponents sounds so awesome, to me. What a chip on their shoulder it'd give the team someone handpicked as the worst. Could be fun.
Jeff Passan
@JeffPassanOct 8
Major League Baseball proposed cutting the regular-season schedule from 162 games to 154 games in a bargaining session with the MLBPA today. Also part of its proposal: higher seeds in playoffs get to choose their opponents, and division series expand to seven games.
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DND folks in LA! Tonight I am the only player in a show where there are FOUR DUNGEON MASTERS. They'll all simultaneously DM me through a one-shot. Look at this lineup of DMs! Paula Deming, Mary Lou, Amy Vorpahl, and Jared Logan run the game together! eventbrite.com/e/4-dms-1-kyl…
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One of my favorite "Class Action Lawsuit Ad Images" i've ever scrolled upon.
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Just discovered that phone app that makes it look like i'm drinking a pint of beer. incredible stuff
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FUCK THERE GOES MY FUCKING TUESDAY
FactPost
@factpostnewsSep 1
Chocolate eyeballs in 13 states have been recalled over undeclared allergens.
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Endless things can be said about Dolly Parton, who may have been the greatest living American. Rest in peace to the best.
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Marvel Studios
@MarvelStudiosJul 26
Just announced in Hall H: Ryan Gosling joins the MCU in Marvel Studios' Ghost Rider, directed by Shawn Levy. Only in theaters 2028. #SDCC
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Kyle Ayers retweeted
Pat Tomasulo@pattomasuloJul 20
I’ll be speaking at @TEDxChicago this year about the realities of being a caregiver. True to fashion, I will not mince words. It’ll be funny, raw, deeply personal, and hopefully illuminating. But not motivational- I don’t do Tony Robbins. See you October 3rd. Tickets on sale.
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My family and I voted for the Blue M&M back in 1995 and he spent less time in office than most everyone in Congress.
Nerdist
@nerdistJul 10
Say goodbye to Blue and Brown M&Ms. Mars will stop including the two colors staring this August nerdist.com/article/mms-anno…
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Not saying that game was stolen from Egypt but it is now on display at museum in London.
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I hate when refs miss calls I also hate when refs use replay to get calls right, it's really wild how that sways depending on how my team does but the good news is I regulate my feelings pretty well
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I forgot the name of that Nickelodeon doc and just called it "Aaahh! Real Monsters!"
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Kyle Ayers retweeted
Kyle Ayers@kyleayersJun 22
Tonight Los Angeles!
Kyle Ayers@kyleayersJun 15
Running this new show at @ElysianTheater next Monday June 22 where I ask comedians to try out jokes on topics they don't normally joke about. Crazy good lineup. elysiantheater.com/shows/kyl…
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Tonight Los Angeles!
Kyle Ayers@kyleayersJun 15
Running this new show at @ElysianTheater next Monday June 22 where I ask comedians to try out jokes on topics they don't normally joke about. Crazy good lineup. elysiantheater.com/shows/kyl…
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This is Monday in LA. I am not a pristine promoter, if you get a ticket today and send me proof I'll draw you a picture of an animal of your choice.
Kyle Ayers@kyleayersJun 15
Running this new show at @ElysianTheater next Monday June 22 where I ask comedians to try out jokes on topics they don't normally joke about. Crazy good lineup. elysiantheater.com/shows/kyl…
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Between the US winning their first two games and some random MLS player scoring a hat trick for Argentina it’s been quite a start for US soccer all around.
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Kyle Ayers retweeted
Kyle Ayers@kyleayersJun 15
Running this new show at @ElysianTheater next Monday June 22 where I ask comedians to try out jokes on topics they don't normally joke about. Crazy good lineup. elysiantheater.com/shows/kyl…
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Running this new show at @ElysianTheater next Monday June 22 where I ask comedians to try out jokes on topics they don't normally joke about. Crazy good lineup. elysiantheater.com/shows/kyl…
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