Katherine Dalton

Just heard Fiona Apple sing "Frosty the Snowman" on the radio and I'm not really sure what to think about anything anymore. I am shaken.

*listening to "Kanye" by @TheChainsmokers "Do you think Kanye is somewhere in rehab listening to this song?" - @mandrewdalton

I miss the old Kanye

"My hell would have kites. Kites are sky demons."

Me: did you fart? @mandrewdalton: *leans down and sniffs at butt level* yep.

I would like to retract previous statement - experience was like being inside a snow globe of allergy nightmares.

Finally found a quick and easy way to get all the dog hair out of my car: drive really fast with the windows down.

Did anyone drive to see sunsets somewhere pretty before Instagram?

Stages of dishwasher grief Month 1: this isn't so bad Month 2: I wonder how much a dishwasher costs Month 3: NO ONE SHOULD LIVE THIS WAY

My ability to eat cake for breakfast after over eating cake last night is like a mom forgetting the pain of childbirth to have a 2nd baby.

An actual college student said to me "I want a vintage ipod so bad" so I guess I'm old now

SIA & KENDRICK ON A TRACK TOGETHER GOD IS REAL

Opens front door to find giant spider on porch. Slams door closed. Prepares self for Emily Dickinson lifestyle.

"Oh no. When she starts thinking about birthday cake she's basically useless until she gets birthday cake" - Ben Wyatt. Too relatable.

Where can you find sweatpants off the highway at 5 am? Driving to a morning mountain shoot and deeply regretting my decision to wear shorts.

girl I wish I had made it up but nope chocolate on the forehead. How did it get there? A mystery only God may know.

I'm in love with my city b**ch I sleep in my hat

Found what I thought was a new mole on my forehead. Got concerned about sun damage. Nope no worries just chocolate.

"I've been craving salt lately" -me "My grandma craved salt before she died." -@tonilawrimore