Sometimes I need to vacuum the whole house, tackle some laundry, cook a meal no likes and take one look at my undone to-do-list to remind myself who the heck I am. - Mom

walking by people’s trashcans the week between Christmas and New Years be like yeah, Betty, I see that empty beer box, the pizza boxes and McDonald’s bag, that you got some new Nikes and bought a scale, same girl, same.

where my gold medal be at for all the mental gymnastics I’m doing in the month of December #askingformyself

you can spend your whole life chasing dreams, and you will, but what “living the dream” really is … it’s living, loving and appreciating your present.

U ever feel yourself being challenged, but feel yourself rising to the challenge? Like u feel urself going thru growth and there be like all these growing pains, but ure like yeah…this is good…real good. ‘Cause, yeah, it be like that.

me to me: Give it to God. me to God: SOOOOOO…HOWS IT GOING????

Me: It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem - it’s me. GOD: You need to calm down. … chats w/ the Big Guy (Taylor’s version)

when you make a veggie-packed salad that is the epitome of a child’s nightmare-meal AND YOU ARE REALLY EXCITED ABOUT IT …you have reached the epitome of adulthood.

prayers for my husband who just told me to “pack light” for our summer vacation with three kids. gonna forget to pack you, bro. 🙄

Wake up and play. I mean… Wake up and slay. I mean… Wake up and play. I mean… Try to find a way to do both. 🤗

Look for the GOOD. If you can’t find it, look for the GOD. You’re sure to find Him. ❤️

If rain from @taylorswift13’s Eras Tour at Gillette Stadium can be bottled and sold for $250 a pop, surely you can wake up, drink coffee and do the things. #justsayin #morningmotivation

If Martha Stewart can do a thirst trap on the cover of Sports Illustrated at 81, I can surely get these kids to school on time at age 37 …she whispers to herself on a Tuesday in May.

U ARE MORE THAN ABLE. God 24.7

If any of y’all mamas out there earned the title of “Worst Mom EVER” prior to 3:29pm today, you are stripped of said honor as my seven year-old bestowed it upon me at approx 3:30pm. 👸😵‍💫🙃

Them: After-school programs can support social, emotional, cognitive, and academic development, reduce risky behaviors, promote physical health, & provide a safe & supportive environment for children & youth! Parents: great. but it’s also why we drink & we outta money

Cupid: It’s Valentine’s Day! Go out and celebrate! Youth Sports: hold my beer.

‼️MEN EVERYWHERE CONFUSED‼️ Can she buy herself flowers or am I supposed to get them, I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO ??!!!!! Thanks @MileyCyrus. This is fun.

my parenting style is best described as “mistakes have been made”