Joe Crespo

.@ExpressToll your site is fully broken. Trying to sign up while paying a toll doesn’t work. Trying to sign up by entering my make opens an endless, unsorted list.

Me: Yelp, I’m in Portland! Whats good for brunch? Yelp: McDonalds. Me: uh… okay. What else you got for breakfast? Yelp: Taco Bell. Me: Google, help me out. Yelp’s drunk.

"Respondent Burden: 15 minutes" @DeptVetAffairs, the 15 minute estimate is several orders of magnitude too low. As someone helping an elderly veteran suffering from dementia get the benefits he's earned, it's taken hours of research, emails, and calls just to find this form.

HubSpot: Track emails? No problem! PipeDrive: Track emails? First, follow 60 simple steps to sync your account, then hover over every icon until you find two greyed out, unlabeled icons that activate this feature. What did I do to hurt you, @pipedrive?

Hot take: Great designs that add friction to the user journey are not great designs.

“Hello, Sarah McLachlan? Daisy Roobadoo calling again. My lazy humans are back on their bs.”

We all need to hang out at home more. Hear me out: There was nothing to do in 2020/2021. Then, 2022 ends with AI writing marketing emails to announce that humanity has achieved fusion.

I don’t know how to feel about clicking that button.

Dear @Petco, On every page load your website opens modal window asking if I want to use the app. I assure you, I was not suffering from a head injury the last 40 times I said “no.”

She shorted Meta.

Looks evil af. So does his human.

Hi @prattandwhitney, I'm no rocket scientist, but adding an "O" at the end of this engine's acronym will move units.

Pro-tip #17: Scream at customers until they buy something

A guaranteed 10% efficiency increase for all Google-based businesses when Gmail defaults to sending all incoming emails from Gmail.com straight to junk.

I produce a photo essay of breadcrumbs back to my car whenever I park at an airport. Am I the only one?

I was today years old when I learned “babe, are you okay?” is Twitter’s new “I was today years old” trope.

If your RFP lists requirements, number them. Only have two requirements? Number them anyway.

Super excited to get started!! #DSRAL