THREE YEARS. Three years since the moment my life changed forever. Even now, it feels so unreal that sometimes I still can’t fully comprehend that I was kidnapped and taken to Gaza. Sometimes it feels like it was all just a nightmare I somehow woke up from. But at the same time, the pain is always here. It never really leaves, and sometimes, it only gets stronger. This year, when I went to visit the graves of my friends, I felt like it had somehow become even harder. Maybe because the hostages are finally home. Maybe because I’m no longer part of that fight. Or maybe because everyone else has already graduated, moved to Tel Aviv, and started their careers. And you remain there, like a memory from another life. A life that was innocent, young, and happy. A group of friends simply enjoying life, dreaming big, with no idea how quickly everything could change. I miss you every single day. With every step I take, on every path I choose, I find myself wondering what it would be like if you were still here beside me. As more time passes, I realize that soon, more time will have passed since we lost you than the amount of time I actually had the chance to know you. And that is something I still can’t accept. To me, you are always with me. And for those of us who have lost someone we love, it isn’t easy to watch the world keep moving when some people’s lives simply stopped. It isn’t easy to live with the guilt of being the ones who are still here. But we have to keep going, because that is what they would have wanted for us. We have to learn to live alongside the pain. Embrace it. Forgive it. Understand it. But at the same time, keep looking forward. Give yourself permission to LIVE.