All of my classmates at school used to ask me to put their Ninja Turtles’ belts back on because I had small hands. Now I’m doing it for their children 😍
Scranton, PA
Joined October 2009
- Tweets5.8K
- Following876
- Followers252
- Likes14.4K
Aww, I rushed to see if the news was incorrect and saw her wiki change in real time from “is” to “was”. I loved @RachaelLillis. Her voice is permanently embedded to my brain like all of the best VO actors.
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I went to a wedding over the weekend and the bride and groom’s first dance was set to the Gremlins theme song. It was cute at first, but it’s a long song and they weren’t even dancing romantically, just had their hands up in the air scratching around. It’s a newfangled world.
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I’ve had it up to here with these Adam’s apple hairs!! I shave and I shave and I keep missing the ones on the apple.
Makes me look like Goofy!!
This is an outrage.
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Is Ellen nice yet? Because I’m getting really bored of watching all of these other talk show hosts, need my fix.
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If Chris Pine gets spat upon one more time, I’M OUT! I will no longer watch a single film by him EVER AGAIN. How can I suspend my disbelief if he’s a walking spittoon?!
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Chris Pine is having a lot of success with his new Dungeon movie. It would be a real shame if someone were to…spit on his very lap.
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Okay, toilet paper hoarders, you won! I give in, I’ll pay for your overpriced paper, I’m desperate! Please name your price. Meet me by the mound in Olyphant.
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If you end up working with someone who has the last name of Cerebro, I can see why you would think you live is a simulation.
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Donald Trump!
Winter. Is. Coming. And it is a STORM!
(Stormy Danielle)
Stop being a content creator like some of our #nationaltreasures, and start acting like a president. There is still time for you to repent for your big #whoopsiedaisies before you get thelectric chair.
✌️🕊️☮️
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McDonald’s, if you don’t change your slogan I will be forced to bulldoze your Eynon location to rubble! Rubble of red and also some of the yellow persuasion. Rubble! Rubble!
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Unforgivable if Goofy and Donald aren’t hidden somewhere in the live-action Little Mermaid movie.
I set certain rules, and I expect those rules to be obeyed!
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Okay, this is somewhat funny, and I know it’s just a joke, but the cow is not waiting in line at a drive through, and when I get fast food, I am not the one making the food, which it seems like the cow is effectively doing here. Sorry.
My caption would be: Farmer will be happy
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I just had my retainer removed after…4,000 years. I feel like my tongue is a tiger let back into the wild. Such an odd feeling. 7/10 would recommend
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A lot of content creators these days overshare a wee bit too much, if you ask me. I just saw Elon Musk post a shirtless picture of his barrel body. Okay, we get it, you’re “in the round”.
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The casual viewer might be thinking there may have been a burp/fart that ended this kiss, but…methinks…this is another #joesexposeawhoopsie
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McDonald’s
McDonald’s
Where is your new slogan
McDonald’s
McDonald’s
Reminiscent of Logan
With your repetitive snikts
A tired tit
For 20-odd years it’s been
“I’m Loving It”
McDonald’s
McDonald’s
We’re bored, out of love
So please change your slogan to
“Ronald’s Got The Gloves”
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This was suggested for me, but the chain confuses me, which is why I am against memes.
1. It’s telling me to follow IamthirtyAF. Why should I do this? All they did is repost Veg Spice’s post.
2. I am not 30, nor do I like anything AF-related.
3. Where did Joey leave grass?
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