Oslo, Norway
Joined January 2011
🎄In a jangle of shop-bell, Dutton's Christmas bookstore is now open. Feel free to browse. From history to humour, fiction to travel, each book a perfect gift. Free mulled wine for every customer. Quick-links to buy here: 🎁 linktr.ee/juliandutton
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Today's auction of Council Memorabilia was a triumph! The biro I used to repeal the death penalty in Chadwell in 1986 went for £23,000, the Council Rack (last used in 2018) sold for £48,000, and the underpants I wore when I met Anne Widdecombe brought in a whopping £8.2 million.
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Please feel free to buy this. I haven't eaten for a week.* amazon.co.uk/dp/1399991612?r… (*Just a little sales technique I'm trying out. 'Pluck at their heartstrings, Julian!' my agent told me).
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A human hand holding my new book. Are you a human? Do you have a hand? This could be you. Do not miss out. Kindle version only £3.99 for 2 weeks. Namaste. amazon.co.uk/dp/1399991612?r…
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Ok, I fess up, I was inspired by A.J. Wentworth. Give me a break will you? What does a man have to do to make a living? 'Hilarious!' - Count Arthur Strong. 'A glorious pastiche of Little Napoleons,' - Simon Evans. Snap it up here, my pretties! amazon.co.uk/dp/1399991612?r…
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Tickled pink by this insightful review of my book on Shakespeare by the European Conservative journal @EuroConOfficial by @Prof_Cooper. Worth checking out the entire journal, the quality of writing and range of articles is magnificent. europeanconservative.com/art…
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A huge thank you to everyone who has bought my new book. 'A joyful book, best enjoyed on railway journeys, the fireside corners of rural pubs, the quiet lounges of seaside boarding houses, and in toilets,' - The Toilet Gazette. 'A lovely pocket book of humour to brighten the cloudiest of days. Plus several mentions of horses, which was a boon,' - Horse & Hound. 'Mr. Battley is a wonderful creation. His blissful indifference to modern Britain, his uninhibited predilection for random acts of public nudism, single him out from most local government officials I have met,' - Janette Krankie. I shall be signing copies in Waterstones Carmarthen soon, but if you can't get to the wilds of West Wales please drop me a DM and I shall send a signed bookplate for you to stick in the front of your copy and treasure for the rest of your life. For a hassle-free purchase experience, simply click here, lie back on an eiderdown of contentment, and we'll do the rest. Namaste. amazon.co.uk/dp/1399991612...
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Thank you Professor. See folks? Mr. Battley's Diaries are already being appreciated in the echelons of academia. Mr. Battley has arrived. @CllrBattley amazon.co.uk/dp/1399991612?r…
Replying to @JulianDutton1
I've just ordered my copy. Looking forward to it—we can learn so much from his visionary leadership!
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In the parlance of modern youth, my new book 'drops' today, my brethren! For a feast of summer chuckles, dip into the diaries of Britain's Widest Councillor, @CllrBattley. 'Hilarious! So good I'll be using half of it in my next show,' - Count Arthur Strong. amazon.co.uk/dp/1399991612?r…
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Born in 1878, Thomas Sibley, who saw Queen Victoria's funeral, Zeppelins over London in 1916, watches the Moon Landing on this day in 1969. All in my last book The Parade's Gone By - waterstones.com/book/the-par…
Some may say that unity in divided times is an impossible dream. But what was landing on the Moon? Space has the power to bring us together, just as it has before. Let the 55th anniversary of #Apollo11 be a time for hope.
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Excited to be dropping this blighter soon. Out August 1st from Everyman Humour @CllrBattley
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Coming soon from a bookshop near you, my bumper omnibus of ribald bon-mots from the municipal genius that is @CllrBattley. Out August 1st from Everyman Humour.
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GOOD LUCK SCOTLAND! ⁦@ScotlandNT⁩ ⁦@georgegalloway⁩ ⁦@Nigel_Farage⁩ ⁦@theJeremyVine⁩ ⁦@DonaldCMacleod⁩ ⁦@realDonaldTrump⁩ ⁦⁦⁦@agentnicola⁩ ⁦⁦@FrankCaliendo⁩ @martinscorcese⁩
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Hei @Ruter kanskje du kan gi en beskjed til sjåføren av 37 buss som ankom Helsfyr 1249 at det ikke går an til å tvinge en syklist til å bråbremse på grus og hoppe på fortauet for å unngå å bli påkjørt. Han bare lo da jeg prøvde å forklare til ham at det ikke vare greit. Takk.
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Chadwell is blessed with many splendid tourist spots, not least our wonderful picnicking area overlooking the ring-road. With glorious views of our famous railings, and Wally Crockett's Catering Van nearby, for a family day out it's hard to beat. CHADWELL IS OPEN FOR TOURISM!
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A window through time to pre-Revolutionary Russia - this lady and her vibrant red parasol was photographed in colour 114 years ago, back in 1910, by Piotr Ivanovich Vedenisov. It is original colour, not colourised.
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Andy Hollingworth's collection is a glorious must-see museum of light entertainment. My own humble contribution to his vast panoply, my first audience show on radio -
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Thrilled to be part of the upcoming Leicester Comedy Festival, that will sweep through this Midlands town like a swarm of happy, chuckling locusts from 7th-25th Feb. thelittletheatre.co.uk/whats…
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