John Murphy (@jack_murph) header
John Murphy (@jack_murph) profile picture

John Murphy

@jack_murph

In 08’ I rolled a perfect game in kickball, it’s all been downhill from there.

 Mass.
Joined December 2010
  • Tweets4.3K
  • Following419
  • Followers202
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Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)Photo by John Murphy (@jack_murph)
I’m pissed this isn’t AI
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John Murphy retweeted
Trent (@BarstoolTrent) profile picture
Trent
@BarstoolTrent5 Nov 2022
If the human race leaves behind one artifact about our existence, I vote this video. xitter.cf/okdcfc/status/15885668…
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Just got a roomba and need help naming it
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Sweepy Hendricks, Amy Cleanhouse, Janis Moplin
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I am in talks to buy Formspring
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Hello!
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Normalize saying 3 mins over 5 mins when you’ll be 10 mins
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Growing up is taking all the antibiotics they give you
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Taylor Swift is white girl Qanon
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Have an airline card means boarding early to sit in the second to last row.
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Anyone who drives a used cop car was bullied
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Sunday self care is a solo dinner with $3 Heinekens and the spiciest noodles they make.
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I feel personally attacked when someone doesn’t mention that I got a haircut
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It’s the rest of the world secretly rooting against the US? Cause if so, I get it. We are alllot
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Car broke down. Put in headphones, put on Bon Iver, and had a sad scooter ride the rest of the way to my haircut.
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To any of my friends who win this Venmo thing, I always believed in you 🙏.
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Never meet your heroes @yungsportsman
Dwight Howard (@DwightHoward) profile pictureDwight Howard
@DwightHoward11 Aug 2009
Replying to @mattyj1027
@mattyj1027 lol thank u. I bet u can't walk and chew gum at the same time.
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Pro Tip:
Image from John Murphy (@jack_murph)
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After 26 years I have finally found my aesthetic. Two words, On Sale.
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I love this man. I will always love this man.
Image from John Murphy (@jack_murph)
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