intpedia

Quick question: Does life ever *actually* get better, or do people say that just so you keep living anyway?

Why are (most) men under 30 literally the most useless creatures on Earth? Why do you refuse to think past the exact second that’s occurring?

I continue to live for one of two reasons: 1) My dog. 2) Educational and specialty advancement opportunities!

Therapist: Well, it looks like you’ve got plants that you’ve managed to keep alive! That’s huge! Me: They’re all fake. Therapist: Oh.

Me: partially medicated again looking at the shrapnel of my depressive episode ✨ Me @ Me: oh what the fuck

I’m fried to hell and my salad bag said “thoroughly washed and perishable” to which I thought … hmm, UMMMM SAME

How am I supposed to date ‘in my free time’ when my free time is reserved for ME?

Life Hack: if you cook in the dark, no one outside will see you cooking butt ass naked in your kitchen. 🤣

An actual man just told me he lost two of his jobs at the end of September and has been unemployed since. Sounds normal to some degree, things happen… but what if I tell you one of these things he considered a ‘job’ was literally sperm donation. The dating pool is excruciating.

I have so little sympathy for stupidity.

Does anyone want to be friends on PokemonGo? 👀✨

I’m almost 30, and don’t feel old enough to have responsibilities and a job… Is this the general consensus? Or am I emotionally immature?

Everyone I know is marrying people who look just like them… How long am I supposed to be nice about this before I’m allowed to comment that these couples look related???

I went to make myself oatmeal for breakfast, poured out the packet into a bowl, and then remembered I don’t yet have a microwave in my new apartment. 🤣

I had two margaritas and now I’m looking for another dog to adopt for my dog.

Me: Why am I still single? *a man kisses me and I promptly tell him he kisses like an oxygen-deprived fish* Oh.