idiosyncretic

Ive been told how cool and interesting bushwick is my entire life and then I finally go and it looks like a Midwestern ghost town. So ugly, no food, no culture!

i recently had a friend who’s going thru a hard time ask how i got out of the suicidal pit of despair i was in not so long ago. my flippant answer is that i got a husband and baby and this friend should do the same. my longer answer is something like: spending time a bunch of time focusing on yourself is a trap. you feel bad so you think you need to look inward and work on self care or whatever so you can suss out the bad feeling and fix it, but actually much of the problem is the self-focus itself. get a project that actually matters and that’s way bigger than yourself and focus on that instead. kids are the ultimate version of this, but not the only option. you will by necessity grow, and you’ll do it a whole lot faster than you would by naval gazing in the vacuum of a therapist’s office or yoga retreat or whatever. people weren’t meant to have endless leisure time. drinking your coffee in peace is only enjoyable if it’s in contrast to doing something hard during the bulk of your day. you don’t need more special *you* time, you need way less of it.