Joined December 2008
look, all i'm saying is that boston has brookline completely flanked, it would be a tactical mistake to :not: attack it
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I have no idea who to credit for this. But they deserve a Pulitzer.
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Ozzy Osbourne: ALL ABOOOOARD Me: Oh good. Cool. What's this song called, Normal Train. (A bunch of scary guitars and stuff start happening) Me: Uh oh
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"let's circle back on that" ✖️ Lacks next steps ✖️ Corporate jargon ✖️ Weak-willed "let's settle this in a Boneyard Match" ✅ Actionable resolution ✅ Life and death stakes ✅ They will remember you and they will fear you
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turtles are so dumb lmao
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i can't believe i made it to 2020 and THIS is the thing that drove me to use twitter's mute feature for the first time
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People in the US: “omg wet markets, coronavirus, gross, I’m scared!” Also people in the US: “allow me to introduce you to the 30 raccoons I’ve been regularly handfeeding outside my front door”
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Following an update, you can now pet the dog in Dwarf Fortress
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do yourself a favor this morning and read the following wikipedia articles, in order: 'bagel', 'montreal-style bagel', 'new york style bagel'
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rename cauliflower to 'spooky broccoli'
conservative: Greta Thunberg should be ignored. She's just a kid. She's no expert. me: Ok, so do you listen to the climate scientists and the IPCC? con: Well no me: Who then? con: There's this youtuber called The Patriotic Gamer. He's my main source on climate science.
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interviewer: you have a 3 year gap on your resume that just says “vengeance” me: interviewer: me: you don’t remember me do you?
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its 9 o clock, im the piano man and im in the bar that im in theres a piano man sitting next to me and im playing piano with him
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shout out to gumbopages.com/ , the website i used to teach myself how to cook in 1996, which is a) still kicking! and b) still very web 1.0
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he's makin a list it's kept in plain text an elf just got phished you know what is next santa claus has leaked 2.2 billion user's names, addresses, naughty/nice statuses, and the times they are asleep in their homes
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he sees you when you're sleeping he knows when your awake it's almost like this christmas song predicted the surveillance state
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