Fake Paul McCartney

I gotta tell you, man, it feels great to finally be working with that Apple that isn't my Apple. You know, Apple II.

Following the sun has turned out to be a very tiring life philosophy, man.

In hindsight, "man, that was mean" was probably an inadequate apology for having beaten and kept my woman from things that she loved, man.

Just need one more word to finish this couplet, man: "Wooo wooo wooo wooo yeah / yeah yeah yeah baby baby -- " Hate days like this.

Soon I should finally be able to unveil one of my new Beatle Rap remixes, man, "She Be Day Trippin'."

You know, man, they asked me to rearrange the Doctor Who theme tune once. We couldn't work it out, but I ended up with "We Can Work It Out."

I'll never forget the words I spoke when I met the Queen, man. I said, "Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, woooooo!"

Seriously gear dinner I had last night, man: Unmelted butter in a pie. Mmm!

My biggest regret is that I still haven't written the perfect song about scrambled eggs, man.

Can't wait to hear the final mix of my remake of "The Girl is Mine" with Justin Bieber, man.

I'll be honest with you, man: None of us got the "Magical Mystery Tour" movie, either. We just started filming and that's what happened.

Here's a tip for you, man: When somebody says it's their birthday, say it's your birthday, too. Free cake!

If you didn't understand my old song, man, here's the deal: I want you to give me your money.

I still think Maxwell's Silver Hammer is a cracking good take on the problems with the justice system, man.

Not one of my grandchildren is called Vera, Chuck or Dave, man. That's why they don't get to come inside my cottage in the Isle of Wight.

Some people on here are saying what songs they would do if they were Beatles. You know what song I'd do, man? "Poker Face." What a tune!

Do-do-doooo do-do-doot-do-do (saxophone solo)

I tried to send all my lovin' to you, but Royal Mail was going to charge, like, 80 quid, man.

You wanna know why we were called Wings, man? Because I won't lie, man: It's the meat I miss the most. :(

Let me tell you all a little secret about Junior's Farm: No one named junior lived there, man. It was a lie.