It's tempting to seek out tutorials before you start drawing. You want to know what the next steps are, you want the most efficient and straightforward way. In a society where everything feels (like it should be) fast and easy, this seems like the safest route. But what do you sacrifice? You outsource your curiosity. You stop making your own discoveries, which are a HUGE part of what makes ANYTHING exciting. These discoveries beckon you back. They're fun and rewarding. What will you keep showing up for if the progress doesn't feel like your own? You might say that eventually you'll get good enough and its only the drawing that matters but I can tell you that you'll always be trying to do things better and moving the goal post. So where is the satisfaction? It is in making discoveries that make art fun. They create dopamine. They create motivation. They are always there, like little hidden gems. But you have to go into the unknown to find these. You don't always have to search the unknown alone, it's okay to get guidance and watch tutorials, but it shouldn't be the only way you explore drawing. Make a mess and make discoveries. Let yourself make choices even if other people say they're wrong. Ask yourself what you like and explore more of those things. You'll get good at drawing. A finished piece will always be satisfying for different reasons. But you keep coming back for the discoveries. You keep coming back because you know that each time you do, you learn to trust yourself and your creative decisions a little more, and that's the carrot worth chasing.