Emily Bernstein (@emilybern) | teapawt

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Emily Bernstein@emilybern1 May 2023

Elmo is the most relatable muppet because he's also on Wellbutrin

@elmo1 May 2023

April Showers ✅ Elmo is ready for May Flowers! Yeah baby!

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernOct 8

when I say I have liquid assets I mean soup

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernSep 24

"3 likes isn't a lot" imagine 3 cats on your lap

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernSep 18

let’s tell the government AI is inside a woman’s body then maybe they’ll regulate it

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernSep 16

I can't believe I have to break my habit of not listening to Ed Sheeran to stop listening to Ed Sheeran

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernSep 8

couples costume idea

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernAug 7

me when I get too high:

@bryan_johnsonAug 6

I know some of you find me insufferable sorry about that

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernJul 16

the white house chef should make a big beautiful salad

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernJun 17

"Is this a period symptom or am I dying" coming this summer from A24

Culture Crave 🍿

@CultureCraveJun 17

Hollywood agencies are scouring Reddit for short stories and ideas that could be turned into movies following the success of 'Backrooms' (via @THR)

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernMay 13

Demi Moore’s toned arms take center stage on Cannes Film Festival 2026 red carpet trib.al/DYJYRNx

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernMay 7

covid 2virus 2furious

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernApr 24

are you in love or are you just in a walkable city with public transit

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernApr 12

how it feels to work from home

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernApr 11

influencers at coachella should have to wear NASCAR suits with all of their sponsors

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Emily Bernstein retweeted

Tommy Stella@tommy_stellaApr 3

It’s kind of insane that we’re all lucky enough to live on this insignificant blue ball floating in an endless void that can somehow keep us alive indefinitely and yet a huge chunk of people want to ruin it forever in the name of an economic concept that we made up ourselves

@ScottGustinApr 3

Like a grand and miraculous spaceship, our planet has sailed through the universe of time. Earth as seen from Artemis II.

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernMar 26

Me leaving the group hang when someone starts explaining a board game

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernFeb 25

Lorem Ipsum would be a beautiful name for a girl

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernFeb 12

when I hear my cat throwing up in the other room:

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Emily Bernstein retweeted

Emily Bernstein@emilybern2 Feb 2023

Why stop at groundhog day? We should predict everything with rodents. Put a gerbil in charge of the stock market

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernFeb 2

I still don’t know who jelly roll is and at this point I’m too afraid to ask #grammys

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Emily Bernstein@emilybernJan 29

Just found out that therapists have their own therapists which implies the existence of a final boss therapist

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